Hello Ladies, I have read many times on this website about having to find a 'new normal' when treatment is finished. Haven't quite got my head around it 100% but it's starting to kick in. I am 2 weeks post radiation and before that 18 weeks of chemo, I soon will start to start taking my hormone tablets so there is still more unknown ahead of me. The oncologist did say that I would feel like an old lady and she couldn't have been more right! Little things like walking up or down stairs, I know have to think about being careful whereas before I just did it. I have sore knees and ankles and have lost some confidence since I had a little fall a while back. When I wake up I have to sit on the side of the bed for a little while before I stand up because I have developed vertigo and my legs don't want to work first thing in the morning. I'm still fatigued and have no date to return to work. My bar attendant job is waiting for me and some days I don't know how I will manage to run the bar. This is not really a whinge, I guess it sounds like one, just acknowledging that things are different from how they used to be. My partner and I have started to reclaim our garden ( things got out of control when we both were ill). Takes us a fair while to finish a job, we both need to have constant rests. When I am in the garden, I look up into the sky and think I'm really a lucky person just to be here and promise myself to enjoy the good moments and try not to get bogged down in the bad stuff. This is not always easy for me with my depression, but I'm making an effort. I have found my anxiety has eased lately, I think that's because the BC process has made me realise that the little problems are just that, little problems:) I've been waffling away, haven't I? Anyhow, hope everyone is travelling ok, take care, Hazel xx

It sounds like you are being realistic about your recovery and not expecting to bounce back just because treatment has ended (although it must be a relief to have finished except for the unknown of hormone therapy). Just as we all have different side effects, it seems that our bodies are affected in different ways at the end of treatment too. I wonder if a lot of the symptoms we tend to blame on hormone therapy might actually be left over from chemo and radio? It is now over 6 months since I finished chemo and radio and I still have some effects (big toe nails still recovering, sore spots still from radio, etc). While most days I feel ok I find I still get tired, especially in the evening and I still have trouble with concentration. I am more easily flustered if too much is happening. Luckily I have very understanding friends and family. While I have not returned to work, I am gradually increasing my work from home but find some days are better than others. I have made some silly errors and find it hard to be as organized as before. BUT, I try to go easy on myself and my new motto is " if it's not life threatening then it will sort out and be ok". I aim for calmness (but don't always achieve it!) as I know this helps me function better and makes me easier to be around for everyone else! Just keep taking it one step at a time and I hope that hormone therapy goes ok for you. Keep in touch. Deanne xxx

Talking with a nurse today who was treating me for lymphedema, she said something which finally made a connection in my understanding of what our new normal is. I was saying that it is difficult to move forward and put cancer out of your mind when there are things which you have to do differently all the time because of it. She said that making these things part of your routine so that you don't have to think about it being different is the way to move on. When they just become automatic or just a liitle part of your day then you don't need to consciously think about the impact of having had cancer all the time. I guess we have to stop looking backwards and comparing our life before and after getting breast cancer. Things are never going to be like that again and just as with any life changing event we gradually learn to adapt a new way of living. Some of it good some of it not so but a life we can appreciate anyway. It was just one of those light bulb moments for me and I finally made sense of the 'new normal' phrase. :) Deanne xx

You have done an outstanding job Hazel,getting though all your treatments,and managing your partners illness and your depression as well.I just read Deannes post,and two things that she said,resonate with me.I also,get tired easily,especially in the evening,and I get flustered easily,if I have too much going on at once.This is definitely a leftover from chemo for me,as I didn't have radiotherapy.Try not to worry about Tamoxifen Hazel.I am finding it fine,and my hot flushes are definitely starting to lessen.Stay in touch Hazel.Cheers xoxRobyn

That's a good point, not looking back and comparing. That is one thing I kept doing and always feeling a little sorry for myself. I'm getting a better grip on the new normal now and thank you for sharing your light bulb moment, you always put things in perspective in a succinct way. Saw my oncologist today and she was very understanding. My vitamin D levels are down which is quite common and my restless legs are keeping me awake at night, she has prescribed some things for me that should ease these problems. Thanks again, Hazel xx

The oncologist has put me on Anastrozole because I am post menopausal, not sure if that is much different from Tamoxifen. Bit silly of me to worry about side effects from a tablet when I went through chemo and all it's side effects:) Thanks for kind words, take care, Hazel xx

New Normal | BCNA Online Network

14 Replies

Hazel_M
Member
12 years ago
I think you are right, Helen. I see my GP on Tuesday and I am going to ask him about a return to work date. I feel so unproductive sitting at home, my house is the tidiest it's ever been:) I'm sure I will feel a bit better and closer to normal when I return. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me, I appreciate it. Take care,

Hazel xx
Helenlr
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel,

About 6 weeks ago I also was wondering was my life now the "new normal". I have realized that also it will never be like it used to be but in the last couple of weeks it has felt a lot better.

I have realized that I have been very lucky and my experience with Breast Cancer has not been near as bad as other people that I have met along my journey. I was diagnosed at the end of August last year and my tumor was Her 2 and Estrogen positive. I finished Chemo at the end of January this year and due to a 3 and 1/2 week stint in hospital in February which delayed my Radiation, I have just finished it just over a week ago. I am on Herceptin and I will finish this at the end of November this year. I have just started Letrozole yesterday and I will be on this for the next 5 years and I am hoping the side affects aren't going to be bad.

I have been very lucky that I haven't had many side affects, the only side affects I have had are the loss of my finger and toe nails. I also have numbness in my fingers & toes. Due to my size I am also having Seroma (fluid) drained twice a week. I was also very lucky with my Radiation that the burns weren't very bad.

I live in Tasmania on my own and my 2 adult girls and my extended family live on the Mainland. As I have only been in Tasmania for just under 3 years and I have lived in 2 different areas in that 3 years, I have not made many close friends here. After I got out of hospital in February, I was feeling really "down and out" and due to this I was lonely and really missing my daughters and my friends from where I used to live. Due to this, I started calling into my work at least once a week for a visit and it felt good to catch up with every one and for just that little while, it felt "normal". So because of this I pushed my Doctor to letting me go back to work just for 3 days a week for just 3 hrs each time. From the first day I started back at work, it has felt great, for those 3 hrs I was there is felt as close to "normal" that I think I could feel, my loneliness started to go away, my health seemed to pick up and even my appetite came back. I have just finished doing a couple of weeks of 3 hrs a day/5 days a week and after twisting my Doctors arm last week, tomorrow is the day I start back full time. I know I am probably going to be warn out by the end of the first day but I know I will get used to it just like I did when I started back for the 3 days a week but I know I will get used to it.

Going back to work was the best thing I did and it is the closest thing for me to being "normal"......it is my "new normal". Keep up the good work and I hope your life will get back to as normal as it can be soon xx
Helenlr
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel,

About 6 weeks ago I also was wondering was my life now the "new normal". I have realized that also it will never be like it used to be but in the last couple of weeks it has felt a lot better.

I have realized that I have been very lucky and my experience with Breast Cancer has not been near as bad as other people that I have met along my journey. I was diagnosed at the end of August last year and my tumor was Her 2 and Estrogen positive. I finished Chemo at the end of January this year and due to a 3 and 1/2 week stint in hospital in February which delayed my Radiation, I have just finished it just over a week ago. I am on Herceptin and I will finish this at the end of November this year. I have just started Letrozole yesterday and I will be on this for the next 5 years and I am hoping the side affects aren't going to be bad.

I have been very lucky that I haven't had many side affects, the only side affects I have had are the loss of my finger and toe nails. I also have numbness in my fingers & toes. Due to my size I am also having Seroma (fluid) drained twice a week. I was also very lucky with my Radiation that the burns weren't very bad.

I live in Tasmania on my own and my 2 adult girls and my extended family live on the Mainland. As I have only been in Tasmania for just under 3 years and I have lived in 2 different areas in that 3 years, I have not made many close friends here. After I got out of hospital in February, I was feeling really "down and out" and due to this I was lonely and really missing my daughters and my friends from where I used to live. Due to this, I started calling into my work at least once a week for a visit and it felt good to catch up with every one and for just that little while, it felt "normal". So because of this I pushed my Doctor to letting me go back to work just for 3 days a week for just 3 hrs each time. From the first day I started back at work, it has felt great, for those 3 hrs I was there is felt as close to "normal" that I think I could feel, my loneliness started to go away, my health seemed to pick up and even my appetite came back. I have just finished doing a couple of weeks of 3 hrs a day/5 days a week and after twisting my Doctors arm last week, tomorrow is the day I start back full time. I know I am probably going to be warn out by the end of the first day but I know I will get used to it just like I did when I started back for the 3 days a week but I know I will get used to it.

Going back to work was the best thing I did and it is the closest thing for me to being "normal"......it is my "new normal". Keep up the good work and I hope your life will get back to as normal as it can be soon xx
ShadyLady
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel Sorry, I think auto correct (or my bad typing) took over on my post above. It should have read "my knee" not "my need". Hope you are fighting fit this morning! Regards
Janet_Plummer
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel,

Maybe you could ask your oncologist whether you could switch from your aromatase inhibitor to tamoxifen if the side effects are making you so miserable. Tamoxifen works for post-menopausal women too although apparently it is slightly less effective in reducing recurrance. I am post-menopausal since chemo. Periods stopped about 18 months ago. I am now 48. My onc suggesting switching to an AI after a year of no periods but I've opted to stay on tamoxifen because I've had no side effects with it. I seem to have read a lot more stories about people having a terrible time with AIs than I have about women having problems with tamoxifen. My oncologist is fine with my decision.

Of course like any drug tamoxifen does have the its risks - small increased chance of uterine or endometrial cancer, incresed risk of blood clots and one or two other things. But it doesn't create the daily misery that aromatase inhibitors seem to inflict on so many women.

There may be other reasons why you can't take it. But it just seems to me that doctors seem to be automatically putting post-menopausal women on AIs when a very similar protection can be provided by tamoxifen without the premature aging effects on your joints and bones etc.

Could be worth asking. Good luck, Janet.
Janet_Plummer
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel,

Maybe you could ask your oncologist whether you could switch from your aromatase inhibitor to tamoxifen if the side effects are making you so miserable. Tamoxifen works for post-menopausal women too although apparently it is slightly less effective in reducing recurrance. I am post-menopausal since chemo. Periods stopped about 18 months ago. I am now 48. My onc suggesting switching to an AI after a year of no periods but I've opted to stay on tamoxifen because I've had no side effects with it. I seem to have read a lot more stories about people having a terrible time with AIs than I have about women having problems with tamoxifen. My oncologist is fine with my decision.

Of course like any drug tamoxifen does have the its risks - small increased chance of uterine or endometrial cancer, incresed risk of blood clots and one or two other things. But it doesn't create the daily misery that aromatase inhibitors seem to inflict on so many women.

There may be other reasons why you can't take it. But it just seems to me that doctors seem to be automatically putting post-menopausal women on AIs when a very similar protection can be provided by tamoxifen without the premature aging effects on your joints and bones etc.

Could be worth asking. Good luck, Janet.
maljean
Member
12 years ago
Hazel what did your doc prescribe you for restless legs ? I have restless legs also and it drives me nuts at night time .
maljean
Member
12 years ago
Hazel what did your doc prescribe you for restless legs ? I have restless legs also and it drives me nuts at night time .
ShadyLady
Member
12 years ago
Hi Hazel I have found with the aromatase inhibitor, the side effects do come and go. For a while, I had themtrigger finger and my need takes about 2 minutes to loosen up after I have been sitting for a while. Small price to pay - after one year the breast lump is not palpable (I did not have surgery as it had spread already) and not visible on mammogram or ultrasound. Take it easy - it gets better!
Hazel_M
Member
12 years ago
The oncologist has put me on Anastrozole because I am post menopausal, not sure if that is much different from Tamoxifen. Bit silly of me to worry about side effects from a tablet when I went through chemo and all it's side effects:) Thanks for kind words, take care,

Hazel xx