Long journeys

I am finding that keeping up a "brave face" is wearing me down.. The continual blood tests, oncologists visit where I keep getting told my markers are increasing. Side effects from radiation and medication and waiting to have a scan for staging. I have had great advice from BCNA counsellor which gives me coping strategies but I still feel hopeless. 

It was my birthday today and dear friends and family made it such a happy day. I know to live each day the best I can but I want to yell at that horrible cancer to just leave me alone.

Well that little self absorbed rant has made me feel a bit better.

Just a note to all you lovely ladies that what didn't work for me has worked for many others. I'm feeling scared I might have to go back on IV chemo and that is daunting .

I sometimes feel I'm looking at myself and thinking that can't be me.

At the moment each day I do something for myself ( which usually includes family and friends) and just enjoy each moment.

Hope everything is going well for all of you.

Karel??????