First date with oncologist

I know what you mean about the chemo room. I sort of didn't look too closely, rather like a dog in the vets office, not happening to me denial.

I did however go  home and plan what I could do when I did have to sit in the chair. I took a book which was handy since my hubby didn't bring anything to keep him amused so he read the book. The first chemo is rather a long one as they infuse it more slowly looking to see if you have any reactions. I also took my laptop which has a little dvd player inside and put on a movie with great uplifting music in it. Twister is my favourite movie, and I had headphones so I didn't blast everyone else in the chemo ward. I also had a Telstra prepaid dongle usb thing which plugs into the laptop. I got it from Woolworths a while ago and I can have the internet on with it. My face book friend was cyber space with me during the whole chemo time and that was great as well.

BTW 15th day, hair falling out. I have a lot of hair though so I may be able to adjust day by day as it will take a while to all fall out. Maybe enough will stay that I don't become completely bald? One can only hope.

Hi Brenda,

i don't go on here much but I have been following your journey so far. My first chemo round starts on Thursday morning and I have just had to come to terms that I will be bald for a while but if it means getting better then it's a small price to pay. I keep telling myself the sooner I start, the sooner it will be over. I was dealing with things ok until my oncologist took me through to the chemo rooms so I would know what to expect on Thursday and it was then the whole "cancer thing" hit be squarely between the eyes and I had a complete break down. After crying and a cup of tea I was ok again but now it all seems so very real. Good luck on your journey ahead and I won't be too far behind you

lou xx

Hi Lou, I think in many ways, hair loss is the most confronting part of treatment, because as women, so much of our identity is tied up ( so to speak) in our hair. 

A lot depends on what chemo you have. I was warned that it may start around day 12-14 post 1st dose, and sure enough, day 12, There were a few little bits coming out, & by day 14 it was coming out in handfuls, so I had it clipped. It was hard to adjust to at first, but I have a selection of hats, caps & scarves, and came to love the freedom & extra time not having hair gave me. 

You should have an information session with a chemo nurse before you start, which will give you an opportunity to discuss these things. From what I've heard, the cold caps are worth looking in to. Wher I had chemo, when I asked, they told me they didn't work very well, so they didn't tend to use them. I now wonder if that nurse just didn't like the bother!

Take care, Lyn

If your hair goes (and it will depend on the type of treatment) it will be about 2 weeks. Mine felt really awful (looked alright) after a week so I was not so unhappy to cut it really short. I preferred short to shaving but both are preferable to losing longer bits of hair. It will grow back! It may start growing back while you are still on chemo. Think of it as an extreme hairdo, not a loss, when it grows back it will be very changeable too at first. So experiment! A wig may be a good option for the days you really want to have hair. Looking back three years, it doesn't seem such a big thing, but it did at the time. Deep breath, this too will pass.

I am the same as you, not my hair. I am day 12 after my first round of chemo and so far nothings fallen out at all. I have a 2 in 10 chance on this particular sort of chemo that it will not fall out. Hoping I can win that lottery.

Hi Lou. I know the news of having to have chemo can be a real shock. My lump was 1.9mm. I had negative lymph nodes so I thought I would get away without having chemo. Alas, no. I too am hormone receptor negative but I am also HER2 positive. So 4 rounds of TC chemo every 21 days for me as well as Herceptin every 3 weeks for a year. I never had cold caps because they were not offered where I had chemo. My hair started loosening on day 14 of cycle 1 and was falling out by day 18. I have done two cycles so far. To date I have lost it in very select areas - mostly behind my ears. I didn't lose patches on top, rather my hair thinned a little up there. My scalp however started to really hurt. I had hair half way down my back and I think it was the weight of it that was causing the pain. I cut it to just above my shoulders and it was fine for a few days but then just started hurting again. I ended up shaving it and got instant relief from the soreness. Since I shaved it, it has actually kept growing. I have short red (my natural colour) stubble now, so maybe I won't lose as much as I thought I would. If it stays like this I think that if I hadn't shaved it I could probably have hidden any hair loss with what remains. In my case I don't regret shaving it because it made me more comfortable and I didn't have to clean up stray hair everywhere. My oncologist nurse told me up front that not all women lose ALL their hair, even those on the same chemo drugs can have different degrees of hair loss. Maybe you won't lose all of yours. Getting it cut short before chemo can help some women adjust. I now love my bald head. My work colleagues and friends are really used to it and we joke around about it quite a bit. Hey if it's good enough for guys to be bald why not girls? My new motto is Bald is the New Black. It has given me a really good excuse to splurge on new makeup, jewellery and wardrobe. I am also noticing for the first time more and more women, young and old, out and about who are rocking the bald look. It just doesn't seem as such a big deal as I thought it would be which has really surprised me. However everyone is different. I wish you all the best. Nadine

Lou, I can totally relate as I was not scared of the surgery, or even the chemo itself but the hair thing petrified me. I'm doing scalp cooling/cold caps and so far at day 22 post my first treatment I still have all my hair. I'm on a weekly taxol ffor 12 weeks so the effectiveness does differ with the type of chemo, but ask your oncologist what they think. Not sure where you live but in Melbourne there are a few options.

I read a saying recently that said "hello my name is not cancer ", and i could so relate to that as with hair loss that's all people see when they look at you and I don't want to be itentified as that .

hugs, Angie

Hi it is a huge shock to be told you will need chemo, it is not stupid to feel this way. When I had chemo I started to lose my hair after first round it was falling out in clumps and this was hard to take so I cut it all off and started to wear a wig and scarves. It was hard but I did adjust to having no hair quicker than I thought I would. Having no hair is a constant reminder that you have bc it is staring at you every time you look in a mirror.. Ask if you can have the cold cap that saves your hair not sure where available ask your oncologist.

Take a deep breath and take it one day at a time x