Second time around
Hello....
I was diagnosed with DCIS Invasive grade 2 breast cancer in my left breast in Nov 2009 when I was 43yo after been sent for a mammogram because I had never had one before. I had a lumpectomy and a sentinel nobe biopsy. A dot of inconvenience was found in one of the lymph nodes which led to a second surgery and an ancillary clearance removing a further 24 lymph nodes. This surgery had an ‘all clear’ result but I needed 4 rounds of chemo as a precaution and then 6 weeks of radiation. I then took Tamoxifen for 5 years as the cancer was hormone receptor positive.
I was diagnosed with DCIS Invasive grade 2 breast cancer in my left breast in Nov 2009 when I was 43yo after been sent for a mammogram because I had never had one before. I had a lumpectomy and a sentinel nobe biopsy. A dot of inconvenience was found in one of the lymph nodes which led to a second surgery and an ancillary clearance removing a further 24 lymph nodes. This surgery had an ‘all clear’ result but I needed 4 rounds of chemo as a precaution and then 6 weeks of radiation. I then took Tamoxifen for 5 years as the cancer was hormone receptor positive.
I have continued with my annual mammograms and ultrasound, have needed a couple of fine needle biopsies but generally had a pretty good run the past 11 years.
Until Nov 2020 😢 my routine checkup resulted in a vacuum assisted core biopsy of my right breast and the diagnosis DCIS. F@@k her we go again! Abnormal cells were located as they had calcified so could be seen on imaging! How lucky was I? If the cells didn’t die, would have been a whole lot different in 12 months time as My surgeon requested that I have a MRI to check for anything else. An area of 3-4cms was located which meant the surgical margins were increased to get a ‘clear result’.
I am now going through the motions of deciding what to do next? Can opt to just do radiation again and then roll the dice a third time and see what the future brings? But I am 99.9% decided to have a bilateral mastectomy.. I took the genetic test for BRCA 1/2 mutation...results were negative, so it’s just me 😜 I also found out from my surgeon that once you have had radiation on your breast, you can’t have it again so if it was in my left beast, I would have had it take off anyway. With radiation alone, the risk of breast cancer coming back would be 20% versus just 1% after having a mastectomy..
In my head it’s a no brainer but I am really starting to grieve about my decision and they haven’t even gone yet!
In my head it’s a no brainer but I am really starting to grieve about my decision and they haven’t even gone yet!
I have spoken to a private reconstructive plastic surgeon and I would be eligible for a ‘Tram Flap’ recon which seemed quite appealing in the start as I would be getting a tummy tuck too (had to be a silver lining there somewhere) but the length of the operation and the out of pocket cost was a lot more that I expected and I have decided not to weigh myself down with that for the moment. The breast cancer support centre ‘Choices’ advised me to just put my name down on the public waiting list, so I think that is what I will do and decide that in a couple of years... I just need to get my head around what I am going to look like on the other side of the mastectomy surgery?
I know I am stronger to cope with this having been diagnosed for a second time. The first diagnosis definitely made me stronger and more resilient in my life. I am not backward in coming forward, never hesitate to eliminate things in my life that cause me grief. That’s why I don’t feel any loyalty to my breasts as they definitely are not my BFF’s. I have breast fed 3 beautiful kids (now all adults) so I really don’t need them anymore and the thought of never wearing bras around the house is starting to feel pretty good! I am currently a DD size so I am quiet envious of my daughter coming home and the first thing she does is take her bra off!!
In all seriousness though....I just need to get my head around this choice as it’s not like going to the hairdresser and having a bad hair cut and saying ‘it will grow back’. Once they are gone, there is no coming back. But I just don’t want to roll the dice again 🤔
thanks for reading my story, any advise would be greatly appreciated ❤️
thanks for reading my story, any advise would be greatly appreciated ❤️
Christine x
