I had a BMX and knew I wanted a reconstruction from the start. It was a lengthy path to get there but I did. I had a DIEP and I'm very happy with the results. I have warm mounds of flesh that are part of me. This year I had my 'nipples' made, and right now I'm having my areola tattoos designed. They're not going to be traditional! So no regrets here.
The funny thing is, out the other side, I know that if I'd gone flat I'd be OK with it. This really surprises me as there's no way I would have countenanced this at the start.
My story with photos is in the 'Choosing breast reconstruction' group if you want to have a look. And like @Mazbeth I used the BRECONDA tool and found it very helpful.
Good luck with making your decision. All the best, K xox