Forum Discussion
Nattyv63
4 years agoMember
Newly diagnosed. Am I being mucked around by the hospital?
Hi I was diagnosed 4 weeks ago haven't had my biopsy yet...that's next Thursday 16/12. Listening to the Podcast is stressing me out because Charlotte was diagnosed and had surgery within 2 weeks whereas I haven't even had my cancer categorised in 4 weeks. Is this normal? Should I stick with the Alfred Hospital or go to Peter Mac? Everyone around me is saying things like "gee they're taking their time," or "it should be faster than that" but should it be? Is the time lag pretty standard? Their stress is stressing ME out lol I don't have private insurance so going the public route. Glad I found this community. Any advice appreciated.
52 Replies
- Nattyv63MemberHaha you’re hilarious AND amazing! Thank you for sharing your story. You remind me of a friend of mine! Merry Christmas!
- AllyJayMember@Nattyv63..Totally shitty to say for sure. I was also diagnosed in September 2016 with Stage 3, Grade 3. Triple Positive, Multifocal, with node involvement. So basically a turbocharged bastard, riding a Lamborghini, had produced offspring and was at the start of a body wide tour. Well F**k me George, various people and situations had tried over the previous 58 years to knock me off my perch, and a motley bunch of deformed cells was not going to win. I had chemo followed by the Great Tit Chopoff and hormone blockers. Well this old chook is still here, (at the moment getting well pickled on a mixture of sherry and Amarula.( A South African drink similar to Bailey's), and rocking along to Queen with headphones on. The cats (ssshhh all five of them), have run for cover and I'm still here...five years on. F**k cancer...you messed with the wrong woman here!!! Eagerly awaiting your story this time next year....much Festive love and hugs and all that seasonal shit... Ally.
- FLCloverMemberOmg @Nattyv63, I was meant to say diagnosis, not prognosis 🤦🏼♀️. The diagnosis is shitty. I actually believe the prognosis sometimes depends on us. If you believe you’ll get better and focus on that, you will get better and beat this for good, so the prognosis can be really good 💪🏻♥️.
- FLCloverMemberHey @Nattyv63,
that’s a shitty prognosis. Really shitty. If someone tells you to calm down, scream louder. Vent whenever you need to. If people don’t understand, leave. You don’t owe anyone anything. This is about you now. You will get better, as we all have. This will one day be distant memories. But for now, do what you need to do to get all the anger and frustration out, and anything else you need to get better. Set boundaries for yourself. Make yourself number one again. - LocksleyMemberHi nattyv63
I've sent you a pm too. I also kept a journal chatted with a counsellor and read lots here and chatted with other members here who have no idea how much they helped me, just by sending a message. I have formed life long friendships. - Julez1958MemberHi @Nattyv63
I also have kept a journal and found it really helpful.
I found once I started treatment I calmed down a lot ( although of course I worked myself into a bit of a state before each scan and before surgery).
I didn’t tell many people in the beginning and I did have a bit of counselling in the beginning which helped.
I did find the resources on this website really helpful including this forum , because we have all been there in one way or another.
Although I didn’t have chemo, I did have radiotherapy and ended up having a double mastectomy and am now on hormone therapy for at least 5 years., I finished my radiotherapy almost exactly 12 months ago and am in a much better headspace now.
Take it one step at a time.
🌺 - AfraserMemberDear @Nattyv63
I kept a journal - the BC Chronicles. BC wasn’t for breast cancer, it was Bald by Christmas! I lost my hair two weeks before Christmas which seemed pretty bizarre at the time. No-one wants this, now or at any time, but what counts is what you do
next. We don’t start being someone else when diagnosed, but it can be useful to direct your ‘up and on’ mode to treatment and positive action (an occasional rave is highly therapeutic!). As others have said, treatment can be extremely effective so direct your energy (even your anger!) to hitting those cancer cells with everything you can. Friends and family often have no idea what to do, so if you can tell them practical, helpful things you need, they may be quite grateful. Take a little time to breathe, to enjoy everything you possibly can, and to focus on the future (there is one). Best wishes. - I have sent you a pm.
- @Nattyv63 do you have someone you can chat with outside of your family. I didn't let family into my emotional world, and found I had to sort of hold them up. What I did have was a few friends of friends who had been through breast cancer treatment, who quickly connected with me and "cheered" me on and often we met for coffee, they were such great support and some friendships developed from there on. I call them my "breast friends" and still to this day, 5 years on I can say their support has meant so much to me. I also interact with 2 cancer support groups, and would still go from time to time if not for covid restrictions.
I was also Stage 3. Still going strong and mine was an aggressive cancer. I am sure many of us think the worst in the beginning, you are not alone in that regard. I rang the Cancer Council who sent out meditation cd's and I think you can access and listen to them on their website. I am also in Melbourne, so we have had all the restrictions to contend with as well. Wishing you the best as you move forward to start your treatment. Take care. xx - arpieMemberOh Darn xx Feel free to Vent away all you want! @Nattyv63. You are in a safe place here. xx It is Not exactly the Xmas pressie you wanted ... and you are feeling totally overwhelmed just now & thinking the worst - but as @Cath62 says .... treatments are So much more effective than 'in the old days' ... and yours is about to start. All the best for your tests next week.
You'll have plenty more nicer Christmas's too xx .... You have a busy couple of weeks ahead of you - and all that goes towards forming your very own personalised game plan. xx
It is all a bit surreal, isn't it. Almost Weird - as if you are looking down on yourself from afar .... We all want 'it' out then and there ... and soon, it will be. xx
Take deep breaths, lots of them ... if anyone upsets you, just walk out of the room and go and lie down, or go for a walk - grab a drink - whatever works for you xx I used to go fishing - EVERY DAY between detection & diagnosis.
Take care & All the best for Xmas Day and beyond xxx