Hi allThree weeks ago I was in the shower and noticed a lump. I'm not a lumpy breast person so I realised straight away. It was tender also.So I booked a mammogram through breast screen and saw my Dr.a few issues in my personal life made me forget a little about it and then breast screen got hold of me. They called me in and did more tests. Biopsy was awful and I did it all alone. Really wish now that I'd taken a friend.2 days later I get told I have cancer. Again, alone.I'm still in a little shock. It's the waiting game now. Just not really knowing when surgery is to happen and what all the next steps are. As I live in Melbourne and the breast clinics are in Tuesdays I have another week to wait!Today I found this forum and don't feel so alone. I have friends who care and my mum is in Qld and will come down if I need. But something is holding m back from asking. Left my husband last year. Has been a rough ride and it's like this is the final piece of the let's keep kicking me.I know it's a good result if I have to have it and I see so many people have it so much worse than me. I'm glad I found this. Dont feel so alone. Scared - yes. Alone - no

Hi Tweezer, Sorry about your diagnosis but glad that you've joined the network. Welcome!! Sounds like you have been through a whole lot in a very short space of time. I too was by myself when I found out. Have you been referred to a surgeon yet? When you have you will find out your time frame for surgery, what other tests are necessary, discussions on whether to have a lumpectomy or mastectomy. If you went through breast screen I'm assuming they signed you up for this network - did they order a My Journey Kit for you?? It's full of information and very helpful. As for your mum, no one can tell you whether to ask for her assistance or not, but for me when I came out of surgery my mum, older sister, brother and niece arrived not long after I was returned to the ward and it was beautiful to have their support and see them. Please don't be afraid to ask questions as everyone here has experience and are all very sharing to try and help others through. The waiting is one of the hardest things but you have already shown your strength. You will get through this and we are here to help. Wishing you all the best. Xx Cath

Hi Tweezer,I am so glad you have found this group! A breast cancer diagnosis is really scary and the start to a very emotional journey. I just wanted to say hello and let you know that you are now with a group of really caring ladies who are a wealth of information to help you on your journey. It's really comforting to talk to others who are going through what you are. Take one day at a time, one appointment at a time and one piece of chocolate at a time :) . From what you have already been through, it sounds like you have an inner strength that will help you on this journey. Sending love and support your way.Susie xx

Hi @Tweezer, sorry to hear of your diagnosis. There are some lovely supportive women here who understand what you are going through and can offer support and guidance along your journey. I understand that you are scared at the moment, I too was terrified when I was initially diagnosed but as I learnt more about my specific situation and what treatment options were available, I didn't feel as scared anymore. There are lots of treatment options available these days and a lot of women have successful outcomes. Good luck with your journey xxx

Welcome. The waiting is the hardest part and we all understand that feeling of anxiety and what ifs ....going through your head constantly. I urge you to contact close family and friends abd take people with you to your appointments . ..it's hard to take it all in. Write down questions. Have you ordered the My journey kit from this site yet?...fabulous resources and it comes in a few days. Hopefully you'll be put in touch with a breast care nurse at your appointment . .if not ...ask to. They are a great source of information and support. I was always emailing questions for a while pre and post surgery. It's hard telling the people we love, but such a relief when you do.Take care. Kath x

I also just want to add some of my own wisdom .. and maybe I will see this differently as I am now at the end of treatment as apposed to beginning it, but it has given me time to reflect and see things a little differently to how you probably see them. This diagnosis, although it feels like it now, is NOT a "kick me while I am down". I was halfway through chemotherapy when my partner decided to get lawyers involved in a separation ...can you believe that? ... while I was so unwell that is what he did. I lost my family. I lost my home. I lost friends. I had cancer. I lost my job. I didn't think it could get much worse. In spite of everything, I found so many positives. I found an inner strength I never knew I had. I took a deep breath, one foot in front of the other and walked the path given to me. It was rough but at the same time, and you will not see this yet :) .. and this will probably sound odd, it has been a rewarding experience in some respects. I have had an experience like no other and have reassessed my life like I would never had done previously. There is a silver lining to everything in our world, sometimes it just looks black but if you look closely you will see the silver peaking through. Welcome to the club, even though none of use wanted to be members. I hope that you will try and find the positives in your world, they are there, they may be small and you will probably need to look hard but they will be there! I know you will find an inner strength that will pick you up and keep you moving forward to better days xx

Just diagnosed stage 1 - feeling scared

Kim_R
Member
9 years ago
Sorry Tweezer that you have had this diagnosis but it really helps to write about your feelings here and there is heaps of practical advice from caring people that are in the same situation.
Share
Member
9 years ago
Hi @Tweezer - yes, sometimes it is the waiting that is the hardest.
You get over one hurdle (the first op) and then have to steel yourself for another.
Yes, agree with @primek, let us know how both you and the op goes.
Sheryl xx
primek
Member
9 years ago
Let us know how things go.
Tweezer
Member
9 years ago
Hi all. As Christmas looms and surgery coming up I am so glad to have this community to talk to. It's lonely enough at these times but even harder having to have surgery and wait for next steps!
Thanks for all your support.
xx
primek
Member
9 years ago
I'm so sorry to hear that you need further surgery. Know we are here for you when you need to reach out. Do contact the Cancer Council. They have counsellors and social workers that can assist. I believe also you can look up a McGrath breast care nurse close to you. Sometimes we slip through the net and they don't know we are out there doin g it tough.

Here's the link to find the breast care nurse. Large public hospitals usually have one attached to the women's health unit.
https://www.mcgrathfoundation.com.au/OurNurses/FindANurse.aspx
ScorpionQueen
Member
9 years ago
I'm sorry you have to do this alone....do you have a breast care nurse yet? She may be able to help with getting someone to go along with you to appointments if you have no one else?.... This experience has taught me many things, but one thing I realised is that it can be a lonely time, even if you are surrounded by loved ones and friends! It's important not to get stuck in that void....reach out and grab the resources availale to you......and remember, we are here too!
melclarity
Member
9 years ago
@Tweezer

It is hard going, absolutely no denying, day at a time until all results are back, pathology is clear and treatment clear. I totally concur with the ex husband thing, which makes it doubly hard. 5yrs ago my first diagnosis as much as he wanted to be there I pushed him aside, I had no support really just myself and my kids back then, it was so incredibly hard. Last year a savage blow with Stage 3 Aggressive IDC in the same spot a recurrence. Again my ex husband wanted to be there, again I said no and unfortunately whilst dealing with being a single parent, working and then 4.5 months of Chemo, I too had to deal with him who made my life very very hard on top of it all, which really hurt and broke me further. However! 6 months prior to this diagnosis I met someone and he is still by my side 2 years later through it all. Again this time as he wasnt around very much, I didnt have much support. My Dad was it really, interesting reality I found, well meaning people I'll cook a meal I'll do this I'll do that....all did nothing....it was the least expected people that offered. It is hard alone, it absolutely was...and even when you have support around you, its still a very lonely journey I found. So step at a time, Hugs Melinda xo
Tweezer
Member
9 years ago
Hi all
I had surgery and have to have a second operation as some cancer in the ducts.
Getting through the post operation and swelling has been hard. Work and friends have helped.
Even spoke to my ex husband for the first time in 12 months. Felt very vulnerable at time but managed to get through.

It's just a journey I have to take on my own.
Payne
Member
9 years ago

Tweezer said:

Hi all

Three weeks ago I was in the shower and noticed a lump. I'm not a lumpy breast person so I realised straight away. It was tender also.
So I booked a mammogram through breast screen and saw my Dr.
a few issues in my personal life made me forget a little about it and then breast screen got hold of me. They called me in and did more tests. Biopsy was awful and I did it all alone. Really wish now that I'd taken a friend.
2 days later I get told I have cancer. Again, alone.
I'm still in a little shock. It's the waiting game now. Just not really knowing when surgery is to happen and what all the next steps are. As I live in Melbourne and the breast clinics are in Tuesdays I have another week to wait!

Today I found this forum and don't feel so alone. I have friends who care and my mum is in Qld and will come down if I need. But something is holding m back from asking. Left my husband last year. Has been a rough ride and it's like this is the final piece of the let's keep kicking me.

I know it's a good result if I have to have it and I see so many people have it so much worse than me. I'm glad I found this.
Dont feel so alone. Scared - yes. Alone - no

Hi Tweezer,

Definitely not alone and yes it is scary. Hope you find someone to attend appointments with. Local breast cancer support groups are good idea. They should have contacted you by now.
ScorpionQueen
Member
9 years ago
HI Tweezer,
The beginning is the hardest....diagnosis, testing, appointments.....waiting......the waiting is the worst. But once you have your treatment plan in place you seem to travel along on auto pilot, doing whatever it is necessary to kick this bitch back to Hell where she belongs! You will feel every emotion. Gather your circle, friends and family you can rely on.....tkae them with you to appointments, it's amazing how an extra set of ears helps! Write down ALL questions you have.....and ask, ask, ask until YOU are satisfied that you understand. If you don;t already have one, find a Breast care Nurse....they are amazing and can realy to you in regualr language what is going on, they also liase between you and your doctors.......

One thing I've learnt through this is you need to be selfish somedays......yes, I worried over others and their reactions, thoughts and feelings, but at the end of the day, you are alone with your own thoughts and you need to be aware of how YOU are feeling......take care of you menatally and physically as best you can.....you will have so many highs and lows.
Remember to breathe......I mean really breathe. You've got this...and we've got your back!

stay strong|breathe|believe
Tracy Xx