@Ad Lib
Uuuugh!!! all these ladies have said some wonderful things and so very true! I don't know but I guess if it were me, I'd call them up and just be really raw and honest. What you did wasn't intentional on any level, talk to them honestly about what you are going through, the shock of it all. That you certainly didnt have the intention of offending or not talking to them.
I lost a few people through this journey in 5yrs and mostly last year at my recurrence. You absolutely cannot put anyone above you, and thats not being awful, and alot of people will not understand that. Family is tough I know, communication is everything and hopefully, they may just understand a little more.
P.S. as hard as most family/friends try to understand what you are going through? sadly they cannot understand the complexity of the whole thing, from physical to mental and emotional. So these wonderful ladies help alot!!! We all help each other, because we so get it....all of it!! xo Hugs Melinda xoxo