Hi ladies,I am a 31 year old Radiation Therapist from Hobart with a 2 year old daughter.A month ago I woke up and said to my husband, "gee my boob feels bruised", a few days later I found a lump that felt similar to when I had a blocked milk duct when breastfeeding, I couldn't get in to my GP that day and the following morning flew to the UK for a 2 wk holiday to see my family. A wk later I found another lump under my armpit.I saw my GP the day I got back and was sent for an urgent ultrasound 2 days later. While there I had a mammogram, FNA to axilla node or core biopsy to the biggest of 4 lumps in my left breast.4 days later (Mon 18th Sep) I was diagnosed with IDC T2bN1 Grade 3 Her2+ ER/PR- My CT and bone scans were clearCurrently IVF hormones and awaiting ovum pick-up to freeze some embryosi start 6 months of chemo on Oct 16 with the ACT regime plus 12 months of Herceptin, then surgery, then radiation.It has been a whirlwind of information and appointments but I'm glad everything is happening quickly, I think I'm feeling a bit numb to everything as people keep telling me that I seem to be handling things well, but that could be from my work.I look forward to getting to know you all and supporting each other.xxx

Welcome! We know it's not where you want to be but you are with friends. My brush with bc started in a similar way, nolump, just a very tender and uncomfortable breast. Mastectomy, 6 months chemo, 12 months herceptin and 5 years hormone therapy. I hit 5 years after diagnosis next month, and will end hormone therapy next May, all going well, fingers crossed!! Many others (not me!) have been involved in medicine and cancer related treatment before being diagnosed themselves. I can imagine that you have much more information than I had (no cancer at all in my family, no personal experience of serious illness or injury) but everyone has different responses and these also change over time. This a good place to talk, let off steam and also share a joke or two, there's a rich stream of humour here! Very best wishes and keep your eyes on the future. One of my favourite quotes from one of the many terrific contributors here, is "Don't look back, you are not going that way".

@JoeyLiz Welcome to you! You know its strange isn't it, how people say 'youre handling it well' I actually think it's just because as you say right now you are numb, you are on autopilot in a sense as there is so much happening and quickly, there is no time to think and so we go from one thing to the next with no time to think. That's not a bad thing as it helps us get started and on the way to recovery. It is a roller coaster ride, I know for my 2nd diagnosis it was very hard to take, but I still took it in my stride but there absolutely were some very private breaking moments that nobody had the capacity to understand. As much as family and friends are great they don't get the complexity of it, so for me the Forum is a great place to talk with a wealth of experience, compassion and support. We all just get it...its a safe place to just vent or discuss. Sounds like you have a great Team already on the ball and ready to go! What I learnt was I had to pull myself back to just 1 day at a time, it would become too overwhelming getting through it. It helped alot!! Hugs Melinda xo

Hi @JoeyLiz.Take care that 'coping really well' doesn't become a default strategy to the point where you don't give yourself the space and time you are going to need in the coming months. Breast cancer is an absolute shitfight, even for those who are well supported, well informed and able to tolerate their treatment without major problems.I was in my forties and a single mum when I was first diagnosed. I did chemo, had both boobs off, was fitted with retreads and galloped through the whole performance. Superwoman, yay me! Ten years later I've had recurrence and have just limped out the end of another round of slicing, dicing, poisoning and zapping. I didn't cope well. I've found that really challenging and it took me far too long to realise the elastic had gone in my super hero undies and that I had to behave like a mere mortal. It's really tempting to push yourself to your limits, particularly when you have so much on your plate. Try, please, to schedule some 'me' time and start decanting some responsibilities so that you can give yourself space. You've got big plans for the future, focus on getting through the next few months in as good a condition as you can. Marg xxx

Hi there @JoeyLiz , sorry you've joined the club, but welcome to you. I'm an Older Fart (59) and have survived the ride of AC therapy for 12 weeks then Paclitaxol and Herceptin for another 12. Herceptin to carry on for 17 doses altogether. The weed whacker took both my boobs in April and I've started on Femara and Prolia sic monthly for osteoporosis. This whole shitfest also came totally out of left field for me and the whole change in my previously very predicable and boring life has been huge. From by biggest daily worry being ...what the heck to cook for dinner... to this new reality, has taken some getting used to. I do try to see the (black) humour in some of it as this has always been a coping mechanism for me. Us girls (and a few guys too) are always here to share the load and listen. My saying, not very original, I know is this...How do you eat an elephant? ....One bite at a time....

I was very matter of fact and knew the plan yet at home a was a sobbing mess as I also knew what could be...and all I could think of was my sons. However I got through and my knowledge helped to ground me (as did this site). However it doesn't for everyone and knowing more can make you worry more. So yep...I was a planner and even had a farewell boobie party the day before I travelled 500k for surgery.The begininng is very quick with all the tests and scans (I must say I was relieved to see the clear bone scans and CT myself)...chemo does drag on..I hope all goes smoothly for you and we are here to help when you need. Kath x

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Afraser
Member
8 years ago
Welcome! We know it's not where you want to be but you are with friends. My brush with bc started in a similar way, no
lump, just a very tender and uncomfortable breast. Mastectomy, 6 months chemo, 12 months herceptin and 5 years hormone therapy. I hit 5 years after diagnosis next month, and will end hormone therapy next May, all going well, fingers crossed!!
Many others (not me!) have been involved in medicine and cancer related treatment before being diagnosed themselves. I can imagine that you have much more information than I had (no cancer at all in my family, no personal experience of serious illness or injury) but everyone has different responses and these also change over time. This a good place to talk, let off steam and also share a joke or two, there's a rich stream of humour here! Very best wishes and keep your eyes on the future. One of my favourite quotes from one of the many terrific contributors here, is "Don't look back, you are not going that way".
AllyJay
Member
8 years ago
Hi there @JoeyLiz , sorry you've joined the club, but welcome to you. I'm an Older Fart (59) and have survived the ride of AC therapy for 12 weeks then Paclitaxol and Herceptin for another 12. Herceptin to carry on for 17 doses altogether. The weed whacker took both my boobs in April and I've started on Femara and Prolia sic monthly for osteoporosis. This whole shitfest also came totally out of left field for me and the whole change in my previously very predicable and boring life has been huge. From by biggest daily worry being ...what the heck to cook for dinner... to this new reality, has taken some getting used to. I do try to see the (black) humour in some of it as this has always been a coping mechanism for me. Us girls (and a few guys too) are always here to share the load and listen. My saying, not very original, I know is this...How do you eat an elephant? ....One bite at a time....
primek
Member
8 years ago
I was very matter of fact and knew the plan yet at home a was a sobbing mess as I also knew what could be...and all I could think of was my sons. However I got through and my knowledge helped to ground me (as did this site). However it doesn't for everyone and knowing more can make you worry more. So yep...I was a planner and even had a farewell boobie party the day before I travelled 500k for surgery.

The begininng is very quick with all the tests and scans (I must say I was relieved to see the clear bone scans and CT myself)...chemo does drag on..I hope all goes smoothly for you and we are here to help when you need. Kath x
nonkyboy
Member
8 years ago
Hi @JoeyLiz and welcome to the place no one wants to be. Still you are among friends and we make do. We have some laughs, some tears and discussions on everything in here. No question is stupid. There is always someone around to answer a query or offer support. I've only been on this journey a relatively short time too. Diagnosed in early June. I get full diagnosis next Thursday following surgery a couple of weeks ago. I'll be glad to know what I'm actually facing as it's been a long almost 4 months to get to this point. I'm also a lot older than you at 53years but I'm raising 3 of my grand babies who are 19/12, 2.5yrs and 3 yrs and 3 months old. Very close in age to each other and full of energy from morning until night. I'm glad to see you are getting eggs frozen and thinking of your future. There is also a young women's group on here which you may like to join. I'm sure there are lots of them with young children too and facing similar batyles to yours. I'm glad you found us. Will be good getting to know you on your journey. Take care xx Lesley
Nadi
Member
8 years ago
Just wanted to say hi @JoeyLiz. I am both sorry you are now in this club but glad that you've found us. This network is a wonderful place to get support and vent. It feels so surreal in the beginning, but I am glad things are happening quickly for you. I too was diagnosed with IDC which was HER2 positive ER/PR negative. I had breast conserving surgery, TC chemo, radiation and 12 months of Herceptin. If feels like such a long time but treatment does fly by. Best thing I ever did was get a port inserted to save my veins. Wishing you all the best in the next few weeks and months ahead.
Nadine
onemargie
Member
8 years ago
Hi there love. You are in good hands on this site. Rest assured treatment can be shit but it's doable does that make sense ?? Hang in there lovey and lets us know how you go with everything. Margie ❤️
iserbrown
Member
8 years ago
Hi! sorry you've had to join us!
As you will see as you look around both the website and the forum there is a wealth of information and very helpful people on here, no matter time of day or night, there is always someone on the forum. Vent away if needed as we don't judge. No question is silly and we do try and have a laugh where we can!
Have you ordered your My Journey Kit, it's free - it will become your bible and help you through
https://www.bcna.org.au/resources/my-journey-kit/
Yes your working in health background will help but when you are the patient the emotions of it all can dominate at times, that is normal, just allow yourself to roll and come on here and let us know so we can help you through
As Lesley said earlier there are groups on here that you can join as well as
Take care
melclarity
Member
8 years ago
@JoeyLiz Welcome to you! You know its strange isn't it, how people say 'youre handling it well' I actually think it's just because as you say right now you are numb, you are on autopilot in a sense as there is so much happening and quickly, there is no time to think and so we go from one thing to the next with no time to think. That's not a bad thing as it helps us get started and on the way to recovery. It is a roller coaster ride, I know for my 2nd diagnosis it was very hard to take, but I still took it in my stride but there absolutely were some very private breaking moments that nobody had the capacity to understand. As much as family and friends are great they don't get the complexity of it, so for me the Forum is a great place to talk with a wealth of experience, compassion and support. We all just get it...its a safe place to just vent or discuss.

Sounds like you have a great Team already on the ball and ready to go! What I learnt was I had to pull myself back to just 1 day at a time, it would become too overwhelming getting through it. It helped alot!!

Hugs Melinda xo
Zoffiel
Member
8 years ago
Hi @JoeyLiz.
Take care that 'coping really well' doesn't become a default strategy to the point where you don't give yourself the space and time you are going to need in the coming months. Breast cancer is an absolute shitfight, even for those who are well supported, well informed and able to tolerate their treatment without major problems.

I was in my forties and a single mum when I was first diagnosed. I did chemo, had both boobs off, was fitted with retreads and galloped through the whole performance. Superwoman, yay me!

Ten years later I've had recurrence and have just limped out the end of another round of slicing, dicing, poisoning and zapping. I didn't cope well. I've found that really challenging and it took me far too long to realise the elastic had gone in my super hero undies and that I had to behave like a mere mortal.

It's really tempting to push yourself to your limits, particularly when you have so much on your plate. Try, please, to schedule some 'me' time and start decanting some responsibilities so that you can give yourself space. You've got big plans for the future, focus on getting through the next few months in as good a condition as you can. Marg xxx
Mrs_H1
Member
8 years ago
Welcome @JoeyLiz. Although we don't choose to be here, it's a great place to share the journey.

I'm 29, married with no kids, and just finished 5 months of chemo AC, Paclitaxol and started Herceptin. My surgery for a double mastectomy, node clearance RH side and sentinel node LH side is booked for 16th Nov, 4 days after my 30th birthday. I have BC in both breasts and it had spread to the right lymph nodes.

I think you've got to do whatever it takes for you to get through this. I was told similar that I was handling things well. I just didn't know what the alternative would be. I couldn't change anything. I still had to do it all whether I liked it or not, so I just got on with it. I allowed myself to just feel whatever I was feeling and then get on with it. It's not always easy but fighting how you feel is too hard during this process anyway. I also allowed myself some seriously morbid jokes with my husband just to get it out. But for me, I use humour to diffuse serious situations so I don't go insane.

You've got this. Cheers, Jen.