@Tammy9 The MRI and PET scans are part of the course. They want to make sure they get a whole picture and not just a partial one. My PET scan actually unconfirmed a suspected additional cancer spot so I was very happy with that. You don't want to get halfway through treatment and find they should have been treating you differently. As @Afraser says, find something to occupy your mind. It is so easy to get lost in this whole trauma but give yourself permission to grieve then move on to occupying your mind when you can. Also, don't feel guilty for your feelings. Sending big hugs.