I was recently diagnosed...

welcome @Peacefuldove  A day at a time - a moment at a time if necessary.  This Christmas its time for you to look after you and do what you want.  And no decisions have to be Mae that are locked in.  Family and friends will understand whatever your choice is.  Its time for giving at Christmas and you need to give to yourself this year.  I can imagine how you feel joining here as I did eighteen months ago also.  But WE are a fantastic supportive, informative group of people who have "been there done that".  We understand most of your emotions and there's a roller coaster of them.  They are ALL normal - sad, angry hurt, frustrated, grateful, alone, victim, and the occasional high and feeling good when we get some good news or something great happens.  Its all ok. You are ok.  Everything is ok and NORMAL.  I hope your Christmas is peaceful and like a dove of love.  Hang in there and keep posting on here - NOTHING is not suitable.  I've ranted, cried, bled on here and the lively ladies are always helpful and loving.  Can I ask where you live as there would be groups in your area and a good way to get in touch with local people who have dealt with or are dealing with cancer.  I joined the cancer Support Sisters on the Gold Coast over a year ago and its the best group of people Ive EVER known.  Sort of made me feel like it was a gift to have cancer and meet these people as they have brought so much happiness and love to my life.  WE are here to listen, support, care for YOU and by listening to you we also gain something.  Everyone on here is your friend.  xxxxxxxx