@kmakm wise and most appreciated words. My partner of 5 years is a police officer with PTSD & depression he refuses to get help for and he was shot many years ago and does not tolerate people who "sook" about pain. I asked him to read some of the tools that are out there but he refuses. He has been good asking questions at appointments, and will cook and clean but won't show me any emotional support, like a hug, even when I've begged him to. So it is what it is and I must remind myself that I can only do one thing at a time and self care is the most important thing right now. It's just really uncomfortable when someone seems to be going out of their way to be emotionally mean. The BCNA helpline were really good before my surgery. I haven't heard from my nurse for a week but I have emailed her. I do have some wonderful friends and family I am leaning on. And you guys are amazing. One breath at a time.