You are most welcome here even though it's probably the last place you want to be! How much you will have to juggle in the next few weeks depends very much on your diagnosis and recommended treatment, so that's the first thing to sort out. Much as those things are extremely important to you, your own health and wellbeing needs to come to the fore at this time. You will find lots of people here who have been through this before, and while everyone's experience is a bit different, it can all add up to a wealth of advice and information. Shock, anger, panic are normal at the start. Once you have a plan for treatment, things get a bit more manageable. Think positive. Best wishes