Forum Discussion
Do I Need Time? First surgeon appoint today, surgery in 2 weeks!
Hi, I got my test results back from 5 core samples last Thursday. Malignant. Infiltrating ductal carcinoma, 12mmx9mmx8mm. Grade 3 (T3, P3, M2). Positive ER (80%, 1-2). Negative PR and strong positive HER2 (3+).
Today, Friday, a week later I saw the surgeon and he wants to do a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. He says I will lose the size of a golf ball in my right breast, no reconstruction but it will be apparent. He's scheduled the surgery for two weeks from today! I only told my dad last night. I'm 52, single, no children. Haven't told friends yet as still processing.
This seems rather quick to me! Before I commit to a year of chemo (he said) and radiation I'd like to lie in the sun somewhere warm in my bathers and say goodbye to my breast as I know it! I'm not ready to be "sick". I'd like to take a trail ride. My breasts aren't large and I always wished they were bigger growing up. But I am happy with them now. It seems so silly and vain. If I had cancer in my leg I think I wouldn't be as confused. I don't have a significant other. I know I'm not my breast but they are probably the only thing I am happy with about my body at this age. I know a lot of women go through a lot more and apologise for what must sound trivial by comparison.
Should I take a couple more weeks to 'do' something - even tidy my flat above the main house or even change my sheets? I'd like to drive north ... fight or flight. But does this seem too quick to people?
Thank you
Today, Friday, a week later I saw the surgeon and he wants to do a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. He says I will lose the size of a golf ball in my right breast, no reconstruction but it will be apparent. He's scheduled the surgery for two weeks from today! I only told my dad last night. I'm 52, single, no children. Haven't told friends yet as still processing.
This seems rather quick to me! Before I commit to a year of chemo (he said) and radiation I'd like to lie in the sun somewhere warm in my bathers and say goodbye to my breast as I know it! I'm not ready to be "sick". I'd like to take a trail ride. My breasts aren't large and I always wished they were bigger growing up. But I am happy with them now. It seems so silly and vain. If I had cancer in my leg I think I wouldn't be as confused. I don't have a significant other. I know I'm not my breast but they are probably the only thing I am happy with about my body at this age. I know a lot of women go through a lot more and apologise for what must sound trivial by comparison.
Should I take a couple more weeks to 'do' something - even tidy my flat above the main house or even change my sheets? I'd like to drive north ... fight or flight. But does this seem too quick to people?
Thank you
53 Replies
- Hiya, that sounds good advice ... but what tube? I have the bottle you mentioned...need more strepsils. Oh dear, is it a breathing tube? Thank you!xx
- Take a water bottle with a pull out top. Trying to drink from a glass even with a straw is too hard when you can't move easily. You will want to drink a lot of water to ease the sore throat from the tube, strepsils helped a bit too.
good luck with your surgery, I hope it goes really well.
I was surprised how quickly I healed and how little pain there was after the first few days. Panadol took care of it.
The lymph node removal site was the most tender. - Thank you ladies, you really are awesome! Every story is different and hard but you have done so well! Today I went on my trail ride and trotted for the first time! It was good to get out...I feel I'm trying to pack a few things into a small bag before the
lumpectomy, etc. The hospital rang and I am to see the anaesthetist sp? this Friday at 10am. Another jaunt down the freeway. I am still saying things like "if I have surgery" but it is becoming clearer ... just wish I had more time. Feeling sorry for my breast and all the times I humiliated her by telling her to grow larger! That was as a teen, but now I am quite attached to them. I guess people having limbs removed are too! Sending tulips, red, to you all today xxx - @viking1 If the going gets tough there will be help out there. All through my treatments I was always asked if I needed help. I was lucky I had support. There are social workers that assist in arranging transport and home help.
I found cancer help line fantastic if ever I had an issue
. Breast care nurses were great talking over procedures etc
More often than not I kept meeting many women who indeed were doing it on their own.
With or without support you can beat this disease many do. - Hi @viking1, I also had a single nipple & skin sparing mastectomy with immediate recon using implant. My tumour was 2.7cm and there was also a satellite which turned out to be benign. I was told too much tissue would need to be taken for lumpectomy so went with mastectomy. Grade 1 so didnt need chemo and because I had mastectomy didn't need rads. I was in hospital 6 days and then home. I was driving after 2 weeks and sat in the sun and did gardening (overdid potting some plants and made myself sore cause I still had drains)but was hanging clothes on the line pretty much as soon as I was home. Did my grocery shopping online and had it delivered into my kitchen and then put it away from there. I was back at work after 8 weeks and it was only that long because of a clingy drain that didn't want to leave me. Wishing you all the best and if you have any questions feel free to ask. Xx Cath
- They told me no vacuuming, no bathroom scrubbing. ..but this was after bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. I managed to cook tea most nights...just couldn't lift big pots etc. You could possibly pay a cleaner to come in once a week or fortnight or once off if no help from family. Maybe do some ahead cooking to make it easier for yourself. And plenty of pantry staples for lunches etc in case some driving issues.
- I was diagnosed on the Thursday and had a mastectomy on the Tuesday after. I was also 32 weeks pregnant. 6 years later (just been diagnosed with mets) I still dont miss my boob and havent had a reconstruction. I got to breastfeed for 4 weeks after my son was born and thats all I cared about. We are all different but the sooner the cancer is removed the better.
- Thanks Bright! Apparently I go to hospital at 7.30am and the surgery is done in the afternoon. Then they kick me out next morning! I do need to get studio flat organised and sanitised. Using my essential oils already. They are a good brand. Apparently oncology wards diffuse frankincense! I am going to fact find on that one as I need the science. Mainly I just like the smell. A new pillow sounds good! xxx
- Hi vik just to reassure you wound healing is usually complete by time you leave hospital breast care nurse usually great contact .important that you have a cosy relaxing space for you to return to home and that household chores dont get done by you for a couple of weeks ..maybe take time to get new pillow candles etc all the best Bright
- Thank you ladies, that does help a lot! Yes I think if I've been told I need to cope on my own in our extended family setting I will stress that. I don't want my dear old dad doing dressings even though he would offer. Niece is having a bub in August and here one week out of two as she lives far south and has no DL (her husband is FIFO). And sis is drawing boundaries around herself regarding my surgeon's plan for chemo and rad. If I do it, she can't cope healthwise or because she's against it. Feels like sort of a punishment for doing it. I know she does get bedridden from fibro now and then but she is also planning on living with niece for a couple of weeks when baby arrives. So maybe best to put family drama behind me and think of myself? This group is a saviour! xxx
