Hi Mer,
Waiting for the chemo is not great and a bit of a roller coaster but my experience of chemo has been very manageable, in fact the first one has probably been the "worst" as I didn't know what to expect or what the side effects meant! Fortunately being proactive with things to make sure the bowels keep moving, some mild pain relief for the aches and claratyne regularly for the week of chemo has meant it has all been much better each cycle and I now only have one to go. I exercised all the way through and in fact found a walk each day even if I felt a bit flat very restorative and helpful. I have also continued some weight training, occasional exercise classes and yoga. I even did a HIIT class one day and some aerobics!
As to looking sick - everyone looks surprised and tells me how well I look and they seem very genuine!! In fact I think the expectation is very different to the reality.
I realise that losing hair is very traumatic for many people but I had a different experience and like some others found it very liberating!! It gave me the opportunity to try some shorter and different styles that I would have never been game to try with long blonde hair before all this. Eyebrows and eye lashes have thinned out but are still hanging in there and I fill them out with some Model Co more brows that I saw someone else had recommended. The Look Good Feel Better Workshops run by the Cancer Council are excellent. They also demo some wigs on women with no hair and you cannot tell they are wigs, they are brilliant so that might be a good strategy for you too. Not having hair and wearing a head scarf does mean of course generally people know something is up but I can mostly ignore this and it doesn't bother me but on some days I did wish I could fly under the radar like I used to.
All the best, it will get better, regards Jual
