66-year old male with triple-positive breast cancer - still working

@traveltext...Perhaps you can give some male support to @pnienaber. Welcome brother and I'm so sorry that you find yourself here, belonging to a club nobody really wants to join. I'm also so very sorry about your wife and your loss of her to this awful disease. Big hugs((())).

So sorry about your wife 😢. You will do better in beating this. I don’t have advice for chemo, but just wanted to wish you strength and send you hugs ♥️

Dear @pnienaber
It’s a tricky thing chemo - reactions vary wildly and it’s extremely hard to predict individual responses. I had a pretty positive experience - six months of chemo (A/C and Taxol) and I worked throughout. I took a day off for four A/C infusions but only as long as it took for Taxol (my day oncology was near work). I did have side effects, but no nausea, fatigue or chemo brain which are the most common inhibitors of keeping working. I lost my hair (wore a wig, didn’t feel the need to run up a flag) but all my work colleagues knew, I didn’t feel a need to keep it secret - became a bit of a nag about getting mammograms! How you respond to chemo has, as far as I can tell, absolutely nothing to do with your attitude - being positive is more pleasant for those around you, but very positive people can be floored, temporarily, by chemo. With a supportive boss, have an A and a B plan. The B plan may give you some working at home options, or a day or two recovery time, whatever you find you need. You usually get a pretty good idea of your pattern in a couple of weeks. I had a mastectomy and axillary clearance eight years ago (not triple negative). Life after bc has been very good - you’ve had more than your share so very best wishes for treatment and beyond. 

Hi @pnienaber,
welcome to the online network but so sorry you have a bc diagnosis and that your dear wife died of the same.It truly is a wretched disease.Gosh, your new job was bad timing but it’s great you have a supportive boss.Chemo is one of those things which is hard to predict.Some people fly through it and others limp. I was a limper! It also depends on the work you do as to whether you should stay on during chemo. I was a nurse so I just took the time off, straight up and I’m glad I did. If you work in an office or can work from home then that’s a different kettle of fish.Some people will do their first chemo round,see how they fare and then negotiate with their boss from that point.No doubt you have some experience to draw upon from your wife’s bc journey- although we are all different.Ultimately do what you feel is right for you.Chemo is the hardest of all(I think) so be kind to yourself.Good luck with your decisions.

Hi @pnienaber, this disease is the pits isn't it. Sorry you have bc and sorry for the loss of your wife. Re chemo I didn't work. I had 3 AC and 9 taxol. The hardest part for me was the steroids they gave me so my body didn't reject the chemo drugs. It made me really high in energy for a couple of days and then I would crash. I had them cut out the steroids on the taxol once they knew I didn't react to the drugs. I lost my hair and I was pretty fatigued but I did walk every day. My oncologist advised exercise to help get through it and it saved me. Everyone is so different so I hope you aren't too affected. Re living your best life, I do everything that I enjoy and spend time with people I love. I exercise regularly (my active treatment finished in Oct 2020), eat good food, reduced my alcohol intact and travel in Oz. Sending you a hug. I think you are very brave. 

Welcome @pnienaber I'm sorry that your wife passed from with insidious disease. 

 'm a guy who was diagnosed with Stage IIIB Inflammatory Breast Cancer in 2014, aged 64. I started with chemo to reduce the tumour size and settle down the skin. I had a fair old time with the chemo, few side-effects. Did FEC and Taxol. Then came the surgery which consisted of a full mastectomy and the removal of all 23 lymph nodes under the arm. Two showed cancer. Then it was off to the radiation for 33 doses. For the past seven years I've taken the hormone blocker Tamoxifen. I'm in remission and doing well. Five years ago I managed to get diagnosed with Prostate Cancer nd was treated with a robotic prostatectomy. All good now.

@pnienaber so sorry to hear of your diagnoses and sorry to hear your  wife passed from bc.  Its really is a shitfull disease.  
Your  new boss sounds good.  Do rest up  and be kind to yourself during treatment. Everyone responds differently.  Lots of advice and support here. Sending you a hug.

I don't have anything more to add as everyone else has said it.  It's so much easier with an employer who is supportive and you will find out how chemo hits you when you do it.  I would suggest checking to see if you have Super insurance and being aware of the conditions if you do.  (Mine would not allow me to work at all during the period so there was no wriggle room to go in when I felt okay)  Be aware that they can take months to start paying out, though.  Sorry to see you here and about your wife, but good that you've found this forum.

Hi @pnienaber I echo what everyone else has said about chemo and just wanted to say an extra "Hi" from a fellow rail infrastructure company worker (I'm at ARTC).  I was lucky enough to work all the way through my treatment (chemo, surgery and radiation) with just a few days off and a lot of working from home.  I was incredibly busy at the time organising rail and sleeper deliveries for Inland Rail but my wonderful manager was happy for me to work flexibly so I could stay on top of everything while managing appointments, fatigue etc.  Being able to keep working definitely helped my mental heath :)

Welcome @pnienaber to this club none of us wanted to join and none of us expected to join.  I hope you find some good advice on here as we have all been able to support each other over time.  I hope some of the men can come on and support you as traveltext has.  Do keep in touch.  I am so sad to hear about your wife but do know treatments change and get better.  You are in my prayers.