@GavinCh It's interesting how often that scenario comes up here, where the younger kid/s seem to care more than the young adults in their twenties. Not everyone of course, but enough to be notable. There must be a psychology to it. If you feel that it's bugging you I would have a chat to a counsellor, especially one that has expertise in cancer. It must have something to do with sense of self as a newly minted grown up, and a protective mechanism against the fact that this is the kind of stuff that happens to grown ups. I think it's valuable to remember that most people's reactions are really about about them, not about you/your wife. Big hug, K xox