DCIS

Hi Everyone , on the 9th August , I joined you all . DSIC in my right breast . The reality of this did not hit me straight away as I was told it was inside the duct and it didn't seem to be spread outside. The breast clinic had made an appointment at my GP's office so I only had 20 minutes to absorb this news before I had to rush to make my GP's appointment ( wish they had given me more time between appointments , I never had time to ask anything ) .

My GP is lovely he recommended the specialist I should go too. The following Monday I went to see her. She explained to me that at this stage she wouldn't be taking any biopsy of the nodes as she felt it is better to not do more than what really needs doing . But she pointed out on my scans that there was a mass she was very concerned about that the Breat Clinic had said was no concern .

So in I went on the 12th Sept for removal of DSIC ......she was taking a biospy of the mass , but as it turned out she removed the mass . It seems the clinic's biopsy shows that it just missed and never picked up it was cancer also .

Sept 28th was D-Day back for my pathology results .....everything has been such a big blurr , I was told it is HER2 ....I was told I would be going back to have sential nodes / auxcuilly nodes all nodes biospied ..and if need be removed ........she mentioned bringing in the pathology microscope and going from there ......she penned me in for surgery yesterday 2 October .........off I was rushed for the nuclear dye to be injected more scans on 1st October  ...since I had this news on Friday the 28th Sept I never ate I couldn't slow my mind down to sleep , I was crying non stop , my tears wouldn't dry up , my nerves were shot .....yesterday my surgery ----non stop shaking , tears & heaving like a baby whilst I waited for theatre ......I have never been one to cry in front of others but I couldn't stop yesterday I was so so nervous wondering where else this cancer had spread too ....my postive thinking had gone , it was lost on the Friday 28th Sept .........

She had warned me if I woke with a drainage bag to expect the worse as that would be to me a sign she had to take more nodes .

I woke in recovery , feeling the right side of my bed trying to feel the tube leading to a drainage bag ( my mind was so negative I wanted to find the dreaded bag that I knew would tell me what happened in theatre ) .....recovery nurse asked if I was ok --I graabed her arm as if I was possessed begging her to tell me if there was a drainage bag ..she smiled & replied " No honey there is no bag "- I still didn't believe her , I was crying pleading with her to please please don't hide it from me ...she came around because my hand was still looking under the blanket ....she opened my gown and said look no tube anywhere all you have is a little bandaid . It is so terrible the fear that takes control of rational thinking ....I have never in my 53 years ever experienced this terrible feeling of the unknown , I have always been in control of everything in my life , now this cancer has snatched that from me .

The theatre doctor that assissted my specialist came to see me before I was discharged , he told me that my noded were Cancer Negative .....I was still in denial , I pleaded with him to please not cover anything and was he telling the truth , he smiled , squeezed my hand & had a tears in his eyes also as he answered to me " Lovely Lady , from what we seen your are Cancer Negative ..but we have sent the noded to pathology just to be double checked & your specialist & I will see you next Wednesday , now our Lady that had herself so worked up all day today can you please go home & dry all your tears and get your mojo positive attitude that your specialist knows you have back .....bring it back with you next Wednesday as you are going to need it for your next stage of treatments ". This I know is going to be Rads / Chemo ......I will be told on Wednesday what is my next step . I must also tell you all , when the DCIS was found I begged for removal of both breasts , but it is not how my specialist does things , she pointed out she likes to not take more than have to at this stage .....but I am ever so grateful nto her , she is the only female breat surgeon her & she always leaves you more brusied because she likes to after the removal , postion the fatty tissue etc inside the breast for a nice shape ...lovely lady she is .

I know from reading many stories you all have entered here that I am no way in the psotion many of you had or are going through , but I am now here to walk along side many of my New Found Pink Sisters ...new friends , new friendships to be formed & love to share amongst us all , support and courage to be spread around all of us, wish I had found you all before today ........Love To You All Beautiful Ladies xxx