Day 2
Yesterday, I was told I had invasive ductal carcinoma. Today, to the surgeon where the options were to have a lumpectomy or my breast removed. Decisions,decisions.... still really in shock, it doesn't feel like it is happening to me, for goodness sake, I haven't ever had even an incision or stitches and now these life altering choices. My sister is coming out from the UK - gosh it must be really happening....The surgeon was lovely but surely she was talking to someone else, not me. Everyone thinks I'm very brave - but just in shock.
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You're not alone. I'm having a mastectomy next wednesday and I've never been in hospital before... not since I was born, anyway. It's been weeks now & I'm still not sure if it's sinking in. Sometimes I feel like it's fine, no big deal, ppl go thru this and get thru it all the time. Other times I just feel lost, all at sea, as though nothing will ever be normal again.
I guess this is the place to express your fears and hopes. Many of the women on the network know so much about what you're facing, and some of them have been there before you. There will be lots of good advice you can pick up here. Me, I guess I'm sort of *with* you more than anything else. If it helps, I feel as though all I've done is study breast cancer for the last four weeks and still haven't got a clue. So, feel what you feel. (wow how's that for empty advice!)
I just wanted to say: good luck getting your head around all this; and I hope your treatment works out fine for you. Be confident in your ability to make sense of things, and keep checking in here.You won't get all the answers, but you'll definitely get *some*.
in solidarity
Heather
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You're not alone. I'm having a mastectomy next wednesday and I've never been in hospital before... not since I was born, anyway. It's been weeks now & I'm still not sure if it's sinking in. Sometimes I feel like it's fine, no big deal, ppl go thru this and get thru it all the time. Other times I just feel lost, all at sea, as though nothing will ever be normal again.
I guess this is the place to express your fears and hopes. Many of the women on the network know so much about what you're facing, and some of them have been there before you. There will be lots of good advice you can pick up here. Me, I guess I'm sort of *with* you more than anything else. If it helps, I feel as though all I've done is study breast cancer for the last four weeks and still haven't got a clue. So, feel what you feel. (wow how's that for empty advice!)
I just wanted to say: good luck getting your head around all this; and I hope your treatment works out fine for you. Be confident in your ability to make sense of things, and keep checking in here.You won't get all the answers, but you'll definitely get *some*.
in solidarity
Heather
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Hi Stoney,
When diagnosed with breast cancer, everything moves quickly and after lots of tests, you normally move VERY QUICKLY into the surgery/chemo/radiation routine. This is very good as the chances of spreading are minimised if caught in time. The BAD part is that everything happens so quickly, we feel like the rug has been pulled from under our feet! We cant digest what the medico's are saying because we are still in shock from hearing the words breast cancer. We are expected to understand jargon that is new to us, to understand what all the tests mean and what the treatment does. It is just way to much information to digest.
I personally have found the best way to deal with it is just go with the flow. Ask your questions (and lots of them); ask what all the tests are for and what the treatment options are. Just remember: it is your body, but the professionals are all there to help you. We walk around in state of shock for quite a while, but you will adjust to your 'new life' soon.
Hope it all goes well for you.
Di
ps: my cancer had already spread to my bones before I even knew I had it! That was the biggest 'kick in the guts' I have ever had. Right mastectomy with full axilla clearance - all lymph nodes in arm were cancerous. Surgery, chemo, radiation and now back on oral chemo. This all happened 2 years ago and I still think 'this cant be happening'.
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Good Morning Stoney,
This is Julianne speaking, just like the girls have said Welcome to our very special world. I will send out a prayer for you tonight asking all will be ok.
I was recently diagnosed 27th Jan 2011. I had a wedge incision on right breast, with removal of nodes only, last Tuesday 15th Feb. Still waiting on results.
Today I feel good but just tight from bandages, bits of shooting pain from where muscles are healing.
I really cannot add too much yet cause like you I am new to all this, but what I can say is thanks to the girls I speak with on line here, everything seems to be better, cause the've "been there, done that and got the t-shirt". They give you a sense of peace and normality. AND HOPE. Thanks to all of you you really are quite extaordinary.
Take care and talk soon
regards
julianne
xxop
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Hi there Heather - this waiting can be exhausting can't it. I was diagnosed on 13th Jan last year and had my mastectomy on 28th Jan, two weeks later.
Those two weeks were busy, i felt as if i was on a merry-go-round that just kept spinning faster and faster, going from appointment to appointment. I am lucky in having a very loving and supportive partner and extended family, my children and their families are all over Aust (Darwin and Perth) and they are all still on this journey with me.
One thing you said struck a chord with me ..."all I've done is study breast cancer and still haven't got a clue". I got the BCNA My Journey kit which provided a wealth of knowledge. We read everything in it from cover to cover and managed tothoroughly confuse ourselves. I even took it to hospital, would read bits and ask questions (always ask ... it's your body and you have to understand what's happening).
My surgeon came in one day when I was reading and he had a suggestion for me. He said to put the books away while I was in hospital, relax and let him and the staff look after me. He promised that they really did know what they were doing!!! He is a lovely man and we still have a laugh about it. He was right though, I did as he suggested (I don't make a habit of doing as I'm told). After I had been home for a few weeks I went back to the kit and had a better undrerstanding of it all, without the confusion because I could relate to what I was reading.
I hope you keep coming here and sharing your experiences with us ... keep us in the loop so we can share this journey with you. Call in for a chat any time .... to rant, sulk, throw a tantrum or just say hello. Now you have us in your life there's no getting rid of us.
Cheers .... Shirl xx
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thanks Shirl, that's really useful.
go well!
H
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As so many of the girls are saying "good luck". I've just had my 2 year check up with my surgeon and it's all good. I was diagnosed back in Feb 2009 with early breast cancer and have had sentinel node biopsy (ouch!), lumpectomy and an axillary clearance, chemo and radiation. Yes, when you're first told the news you go off to la la land with a million thoughts but soon you'll find yourself saying "alright lets get this thing beaten"
The news that your sister's on her way is great, talking things out with family is always good. There are also plenty of support from the BCNA and also the Breast Care Nurses who are wonderful. I really appreciated the My Journey pack. It may seem very daunting when you're just waiting for everything to happen. Take time out for you though, ask millions of questions and you'll hopefully start to feel better about what's going on.
Take care and keep us posted
Tanya
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Hi Stoney
I too was diagnosed around the same time as you - the 22/2/11 - easy to remember hey? I went from mammogram to having a mastectomy 8 days later - i came home today. A whirlwind - my Mum flew from interstate, now my dad is here and I am getting my head around recovering from the surgery and commencing treatment down the track. You are not alone - there are so many supportive ladies here. I wish you the best of luck too.
Amanda
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Hi there Amanda, congratulations on getting through the diagnosis>mastectomy>hospital stay merrygoround. Now that you're home you will enjoy being in your own bed, even though your movements will be restricted as you try to find a comfortable spot to lay. I like to "sprawl" in bed, so those hospital beds didn't quite do it for me.
It's great that you have both your Mum and Dad there with you ... support from family and friends is so important so don't be afraid to ask for help. In a similar vein, you are your own person so don't be afraid to voice your opinions if you feel yourself being smothered. This can happen - quite often unintentionally. Don't forget those who love you are as scared as you are and often don't know how to deal with this journey you are on.
Stay on line with us ... pop in any time for a chat - ask questions, vent your feelings or just say hi. Let us know what your treatment is to be, there will be plenty of ladies here who are going, or have gone, through the same things and are only too happy to help out.
Take care .....
Cheers ... Shirl xx
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Hi Amanda
I found my lump about a week earlier than you, and went from there to surgery within 3 weeks, via a gazillion tests! Yes, a whirlwind as you say. And now chemo on the horizon just when I'm feeling slightly more like a capable human being again.
My darling husband has been with me all the way; I'm pleased your parents will be with you. I just can't imagine how awful this would be on your own.
The great unknown of chemo starting next week is keeping me awake at night, but I'm gradually giving up my overly developed sense of responsibility for people at work, who can, realistically, look after themselves. I'm grieving for the wonderful program I was in the middle of delivering, but in the long run, those people are on their own path and will come under the influence of other wonderful people on their journey. I need to look after number one now.
Keep moving your arm! Go to the stretch point and hold, then push it just a bit. do this at least 4 times. I have found it get's more movement every day, although every day feels like you are starting from scratch again. Do this especially immediately after the first drainage, as it tightens up so quick! (within hours)
You are not alone! You said right.
Good luck
Cynthia
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