WOW!!!!

Cobie
Cobie Member Posts: 44
edited October 2013 in Day to day

i had my onc day wed just gone and i asked him if i could have a double mastectomy,, wellll i never seen him go nuts before,, he was shakking his bald head like a wet puppy and teling me i was silly an that its all up my head an just talking from a onc point of view,, he said that its not going to make my quality of life any better an not going to make the cancer go away,, i know all that,, hes not the one with the worry that it MAY come back an i wont be able to handle all the process again,, even the breast care nurse that was in the room couldt believe what she was seeing and hearing,,, after he settled down he agreed to wright a referal letter for me,,,

hubby and i went into the BC nurses room and i settled down an we 3 taked,, i can unerstand his point of view but hes not the one thats got cancer,,

 

lets see what prof Saunders says now,,,

Comments

  • Janey235
    Janey235 Member Posts: 1,206
    edited March 2015

    I don't believe that your Oncologist carried on that way. How dare he. Like you said, this is your decision and you have a right to make it without being made to feel guilty or stupid. Yes we know that our medical professionals do not like taking a healthy breast for 'medical' reasons but they forget that some of us have psychological reasons which are just as important for our long term health and we need to have peace of mind. It IS your decision Cobie and nobody else has the right to 'go nuts' at you. I had to make this difficult decision myself and have now had my 'healthy' breast removed too. My surgeon did point out that my decision should not be made lightly and he asked me to see the Hospital Psychologist and have a second opinion with one of his colleagues before I made the final choice and before he'd go ahead. He was very considerate and wanted me to have all the facts first and never make me feel bad about making my decision. He did not go nuts at me. I feel I have made the right choice for me and that is the crux of the matter. THE CHOICE IS YOURS TO MAKE. I hope that your Onc considers your reasons and supports you in whatever decision you make. You are number one here!

    Good Luck and lots of love
    Janey xxx

  • Janey235
    Janey235 Member Posts: 1,206
    edited March 2015

    I don't believe that your Oncologist carried on that way. How dare he. Like you said, this is your decision and you have a right to make it without being made to feel guilty or stupid. Yes we know that our medical professionals do not like taking a healthy breast for 'medical' reasons but they forget that some of us have psychological reasons which are just as important for our long term health and we need to have peace of mind. It IS your decision Cobie and nobody else has the right to 'go nuts' at you. I had to make this difficult decision myself and have now had my 'healthy' breast removed too. My surgeon did point out that my decision should not be made lightly and he asked me to see the Hospital Psychologist and have a second opinion with one of his colleagues before I made the final choice and before he'd go ahead. He was very considerate and wanted me to have all the facts first and never make me feel bad about making my decision. He did not go nuts at me. I feel I have made the right choice for me and that is the crux of the matter. THE CHOICE IS YOURS TO MAKE. I hope that your Onc considers your reasons and supports you in whatever decision you make. You are number one here!

    Good Luck and lots of love
    Janey xxx

  • mum2jj
    mum2jj Member Posts: 4,315
    edited March 2015
    How dare he indeed. Funny I had a similar experience yesterday that made me angry. I, after much research and consideration for my own reasons have decided to have a propylactIc mastectomy and double recon. My doctors are all supportive. However yesterday I was at a skin check clinic getting a routine skin cancer check. Whilst I was stripped down to all but my undies bearing my one breast I told the doctor (who incidentally was female) about my upcoming surgery. She rolled her eyes and said why would you bother. She said if it was her she would never have a recon, risk of infection, pain etc. I was so angry. Here she sits with both her breasts looking down her judgemental nose at me!!! I wish these people would respect that we have done our research and as adults for whatever reason have made our decision. That's it, it is our choice and our decision.

    I wish you luck with your research and that you get the support you need whatever decision you make.
    Paula :)
  • mona63
    mona63 Member Posts: 237
    edited March 2015

    I know we all have different diagnosis' and genetic issues; but  i do find myself wondering about the assumption that chemotherapy and mascetomies are the way to go; the latest research also bears this out but doesnt seem to make the headlines like a celebrity who has had certain treatments.  I can absolutely relate to fear aspect and wanting certainty --and i did have the thought about my oncologist saying surgery has done its job-lets do radiation and medication 'only' --easy for him! however i love notion of choice but also respect that not all doctors are going to want to participate if it goes against their professional judgement either.   From this website you do get that chemo and mascetomies are not an easy road with all sorts of interventions and complications and disruption to life and work and family and i think although fear is there it does need to be only one aspect of making good treatment options..and none of them come with gaurantees?   

  • Cobie
    Cobie Member Posts: 44
    edited March 2015

    im glad im not the only one with the same responce as i had,, i till think bout his manner and i feel like i was cutting off his (u know whats).. maybe i should of!!!!

    im still 100% want to see Proff Saunders,, shes the only one that can say NO in the end..

     

    thank you ladies

    xxxx 

  • Cobie
    Cobie Member Posts: 44
    edited March 2015

    at treatment on monday i had a good talk to the chemo nurse that was in the room with us an the oncologisy,, she said that if i was to get another lunp in my boob i wont know as i am having treatment and it will keep it at bay,, and also she said that if i remove my boobs i will be clased as a self harmer,, i dont want that... sooo the outcome of this is im keeping my DD boobs,,,