Newbie

Marnz · December 2012

Hi,
I have been diagnosed with DCIS for a couple of weeks
now but not sure if I am okay or not. A bit confusing I know. When I was told which was over the phone I just said "ok" dr said "no,it's not ok" I said "yes it is I will be fine" I feel I am not sick enough or not important enough to have people worried about me. I know that I am extremely fortunate to have early stage breast cancer and can't fathom what the the poor women go through that get a bad diagnosis.
To be honest when I tell someone whats wrong I say that I had a mammogram and the results came back bad. I haven't even been able to say "I have breast cancer"
Am I having a normal reaction. I don't know how to feel. I feel natural by being positive about it but if you ask people that know me they will tell you that I am one of the most negative people they know. I always find something bad that might happen about everything in life. Which is why I think they are all waiting for me to be sad or angry.

Jo.L. · December 2012

Hi marnz, you are normal for you! You are definitely important to have people worry about you. Don't compare your experience with others it is yours. It is a crappy time to have a diagnosis ( it is 10 years ago at this time for me) and all diagnosis of cancer are horrid. You need to have a good health care team looking after you. Do have you a good gp? Or is there a breast care nurse you can talk too? Depending on where you live ... Take care be happy be sad be cross but enjoy each day for what it is. Looks like you have a great family hugs jo

Tanya · December 2012

Hi Marnz
Firstly, you are important to enough to care about!!!! I too was diagnosed at this time of year 5 years ago and it a crappy time and even thinking back it feels like it happened to someone else, cause i had a picture in my head who breast cancer happened to and it certainly wasnt to women like me!!

Do you havee a treatment plan yet? I think once you have that in place things seems clearer. Being DCIS, you dont have to have chemo do you?

Anyway, great that you have found us (sorry you had to), its a great place to vent to others that had tread the same path:(

Tanya xx

Marnz · December 2012

Thanks ladies. You are all wonderful. Xxxx

poppy7 · January 2013

Hi Marnz,

I was diagnosed and operated on twice within 2 weeks of diagnosis. It was a blessing in disguise as I didn't have time to react. It mostly feels like it is happening to someone else, but then occasionally reality smacks me in the face and I break down. I find a positive attitude helps but don't feel like you have to be like that all the time. How you feel is how you feel. There is a lot of support around, you will find. I have met some amazing doctors and nurses, hopefully you will too. And of course everyone on this network!

Good luck.

V

Marnz · January 2013

Thanks V. Wow they moved very quickly in your case. It does feel like its happening to someone else, even my friends agree that it doesnt feel real. hehe
Thanks for your advice. Xx

wendyb · January 2013

I was diagnosed in Sept 2011 with DCIS and decided on a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction due to my genes even though it was only detected in one of my breasts. I think it depends on the type of DCIS you have as I think they picked up mine early before it became invasive.

It took my husband and I a couple of months before we were comfortable saying that I had breast cancer or even telling people. We avoided answering questions for quite some time. It didn't feel right saying I had breast cancer given that others have to go through the chemo and I didn't but it is still a form of breast cancer.

Everyone handles the news in different ways and I went through all the emotions at different times eg angry, why me?, upset, frustrated, elated, confused. You are often overloaded with information too and feel overwhelmed. We had a lot of support from doctors/ psychologists/ family etc and talked to lots of people before we came to our decision which was not easy.

Take each day as it comes and work out what you want.

Marnz · January 2013

Hi Wendy, I have a high grade DCIS but it has been detected early so it's not invasive. I'll find out next week what will happen next then I think it will hit me, but I'll take each day as it comes. Thanks so much for your advice. X

wendyb · January 2013

I really struggled with the choice of a single or bilateral mastectomy (we were looking to start a family and there were things I wanted to experience). Lumpectomy with radiation wasn't really a viable option for me and it also decreased the options of having a reconstruction later (I was 32 when I had my operation).

Whilst I think that I had it pretty easy, I am very glad that I went with the bilateral option as I don't think that I would be able to handle going through it again.

My husband and I recently celebrated the anniversary of my initial operation and we reflected on the last year. If the doctors told us at the beginning of the journey that I would be pretty much back to normal (with slight limitations on my upper body strength and flexibility) within 4 months of the initial surgery we wouldn't have believed anyone.

LeanneI · January 2013

Hi - I thought I replied to this post when you first posted but not sure what happened to it!!

I too had high grade DCIS, had horrid family history and went down the exact road that Wendy did. I was a little different in that I had a lumpectomy initially to give me time to plan when to have the mastectomy. Did give me time to plan, but added an extra surgery.

I had the same feeling that Wendy has spoken of - as the DCIS was not invasive, and needed no chemo - that it sort of didn't seem really like cancer. I nearly felt guilty when people would ask "what treatment do you need" and I would respond with "no nothing more" - they would look at me as if not having chemo meant that it must have been not significant - as if having both breasts is not enough "treatment"!!

I have found that the diagnosis of DCIS is difficult to convey to others - cancer, not invasive & really who knows what it will do - for those that are not in the BC sisterhood, is a hard concept to grasp.

We all make decisions what are totally right for US at a particular moment in time - I had been living with BC since I was 12 (through my mother - see my profile) and didn't want the timebombs ticking for the rest of my life. So when I was diagnosed I took control when I had a chance to make decisions in my own time.

I now have a huge weight off my shoulders - literally & figuratively :-) and can get on with my life without the continuous thinking of "I wonder when they will get me" as I have done daily for the past 24 years.

So - nearly 3 years since diagnosis, I have 2 boobs that have little feeling, one dicky from scar tissue from so many surgeries (6 in total) and are much smaller than I used to have BUT I know that they are now not going to threaten my life.

May you draw so much strength from this forum and the wonderful members that have so much wisdom and willingness to share. It really is a sisterhood that none of us chose to join but are all the richer for our involvement.

Look forward to following your journey - no matter what road you take it will be the right one!

Leanne :-)

LeanneI · January 2013