2 primary cancers ! Wtfugg
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Tarma
Member Posts: 73 ✭
Hello lovlies, im a newbie here,, this is my first post.. and tbh i'm not doing so well with the addition of the 2nd diagnosis..
IDC late June and after pet scans, pelvic US and a slew of other tests it seems one of my ovaries doesn't like me either lol
I'm just not sure how I'm going to cope with chemo, the fatigue!! I've been in a dark place for the longest time, (explanation,, single parent of 24 years to a son on the spectrum, with little to no family support)
I am worn down, I haven't been functioning like a normal person in many years, everything has suffered, im withdrawn, no inclination to seek out social activities, no energy to keep my once beautiful home in any kind of order, im ashamed of myself for letting things get to this point... the things that once seemed so small now seem insurmountable..
Depression has been with me since the loss of my daughters many years ago (1989 my first born to SIDS, 1991 my second to a congenital heart defect 💔 )
But the last few years, struggling to be all that my son needs has left me feeling so lost and empty, he is my world and I just know ive failed him.. I gave him everything I could but it wasn't enough, he struggles to see his worth, to fit in anywhere, to find connections with other young people, he is lost and alone and im useless to him ..
AND NOW,, DUMB CANCER.. I'm not sure I have the strength for that..I am my own worst enemy, ive never been able to reach out for help even when I knew I desperately needed it. It's been just myself and my son from the day he was born, I had no one to turn to, no one I could rely on,, I just decided I'd have to manage on my own..
And ive done my best, and am so proud of the young man I raised,, but he needs me now more than ever and im so frightened I will fail him..
I struggle to look after myself properly, Depression has taken a lot from me, but what I struggle most with is motivation and energy,, and add the fatigue of chemo to my daily life 😞 how bad is it really? Chemo? Does it last days after each chemo day? Or the entire 6 months you're receiving treatment?
Has anyone found natural supplements that help? Does exercise help?
Reading through all of your posts lifts my spirits 😊 im thinking I might look into the support group at the hospital that my care coordinator mentioned..
To everyone in this exclusive club,, my thoughts are with you all, sending a big virtual hug to each of you ✌️&🩷
IDC late June and after pet scans, pelvic US and a slew of other tests it seems one of my ovaries doesn't like me either lol
I'm just not sure how I'm going to cope with chemo, the fatigue!! I've been in a dark place for the longest time, (explanation,, single parent of 24 years to a son on the spectrum, with little to no family support)
I am worn down, I haven't been functioning like a normal person in many years, everything has suffered, im withdrawn, no inclination to seek out social activities, no energy to keep my once beautiful home in any kind of order, im ashamed of myself for letting things get to this point... the things that once seemed so small now seem insurmountable..
Depression has been with me since the loss of my daughters many years ago (1989 my first born to SIDS, 1991 my second to a congenital heart defect 💔 )
But the last few years, struggling to be all that my son needs has left me feeling so lost and empty, he is my world and I just know ive failed him.. I gave him everything I could but it wasn't enough, he struggles to see his worth, to fit in anywhere, to find connections with other young people, he is lost and alone and im useless to him ..
AND NOW,, DUMB CANCER.. I'm not sure I have the strength for that..I am my own worst enemy, ive never been able to reach out for help even when I knew I desperately needed it. It's been just myself and my son from the day he was born, I had no one to turn to, no one I could rely on,, I just decided I'd have to manage on my own..
And ive done my best, and am so proud of the young man I raised,, but he needs me now more than ever and im so frightened I will fail him..
I struggle to look after myself properly, Depression has taken a lot from me, but what I struggle most with is motivation and energy,, and add the fatigue of chemo to my daily life 😞 how bad is it really? Chemo? Does it last days after each chemo day? Or the entire 6 months you're receiving treatment?
Has anyone found natural supplements that help? Does exercise help?
Reading through all of your posts lifts my spirits 😊 im thinking I might look into the support group at the hospital that my care coordinator mentioned..
To everyone in this exclusive club,, my thoughts are with you all, sending a big virtual hug to each of you ✌️&🩷
4
Comments
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SO sorry to see you here, @Tarma .... Please call our help line this morning & chat with our lovely ladies there. 1800 500 258
.... and also contact your breast cancer nurse (if you have one) and/or GP, and ask to be referred to chat with a counsellor
You've had an extremely hard trot of it over the years & with some support, you will be able to get thru this speed hump too xx. I didn't do chemo - but others will jump on and help you there xx
Whack up ANY questions you have (no matter how small - and remember, there are NO silly questions) ... and we'll do our best to help you with an honest answer.
take care & all the best2 -
Dear @Tarma
Long overdue some attention to your wellbeing and emotional health! Strongly agree with @arpie’s suggestions. I had neither nausea nor fatigue during chemo, I lived very normally and many do. I am very hesitant about how much attitude affects chemo reaction (I’ve known strong, positive women who experienced nausea quite badly) but feeling dispirited and exhausted at the outset is never a good thing. A good counsellor can help. Exercise, fresh air and being in nature can all help too - with lots of things. Most of all, feeling your own worth again - to yourself, not only your son - is really important. Best wishes.3 -
Hi @Tarma
I agree with both of the lovely ladies above. Trauma doesn’t just go away. I also had a SIDS occur and spoke everyone’s ear off just trying to come to terms with it. Since then you have had trauma compounding and my heart cries for you knowing the toll this takes on your very being. Please speak to someone and additionally, as @Afraser says, get in some fresh air and sunshine. It is very healing. All the best. Sending you a massive hug. xxx2 -
Thankyou Ladies 💕 so much, for taking the time to reply ...1
