Newbie

Hi Vonniejoy, welcome to this forum full of support and knowledge from these lovely people.
I myself have only been here since November last year, it’s not where any of us wanted to be.
Telling people is hard and we all deal with this differently, we told our children together and did a lot of crying, I used messenger to let family and friends know as I was unble to speak without bursting into tears. All calls went through my husband as I wasn’t up to dealing with anything.
We are all here for you and each other, any questions just ask away, and you will get responses.
Take Care of yourself, waiting is the hardest , we seem to do a lot of that, waiting for appointments, test results, treatments, Be kind to yourself, deep breaths, one day at a time.

I enrolled myself into a meditation and mindfulness course to help me with anxiety which I found to be a great benefit especially when waiting for results.
Deeps breaths 

Sending big hugs your way ❤️

Hi @Vonniejoy and welcome to the best place you’ll find yourself during this unexpected journey. I had a very similar diagnosis to you 2 months ago (except nodes were clear). You have been put on a similar plan. My surgery is over, then I had a break over Christmas, now just on the train heading into the city for Day 6 of radiation.  (The train is not a metaphor for the journey, I am literally on a train 😂). I have 2 children still in high school and 1 who has graduated.  I also  work full time. Yes telling everyone is difficult because it also has an instant effect on everyone else.  As much as I’m fairly private and independent  it’s quite nice to have people ask how you are as you go through the process.  I had a friend who prepared 18 meals and dropped them off for the freezer. I never realised how much I would appreciate that. So say ‘yes’ if anyone offers.  I did my groceries on line for a while so no need to make the pilgrimage to the shops or lift anything. I cleaned the house thoroughly while I waited for surgery and so far everyone has survived the lack of cleaning since 😊
The kids have also helped out more, I think it helps them to deal with it too, by actively making my life easier.
You have so much support here. We are all in this together and I couldn’t have done it so well without the beautiful people I’ve found on this site.
Sending you hugs, Susan xxx

Big hugs @Vonniejoy xo

Hi @Vonniejoy,

Welcome to the forum lovley.  The rollercoaster that is breast cancer.


 As far as telling people goes everyone has different feelings about it.  My husband told my immediate family, I told the children.  A few days later I told my boss (I work in a surgical ward) she told the lady I job share with and she went and promptly told everone else......problem solved.
I didn't really have a lot of problem talking about it as it allowed me to control the conversations and squash any unwanted advice on eating Kale and exercising to cure it. :neutral:
Although I am not on the clinical side of things I have worked in this ward for 10 years and seen a lot from the other side I guess. Does give you a different perspective on things when you return to work let me say.

All the best lovely.  Stay in touch.

xoxoxo

As the girls have said, @Vonniejoy - welcome to the forum (that none of us wanted to join!)  BUT having said that .... you will find the answers to pretty well any question that you may have, at any part of your surgery & ongoing treatment.   Yes - it is a real rollercoaster ride that - specially coming from a family that has heart attacks, not cancer!  I am the first!

Well done on spotting the 'funny shape' of your boob and doing something about it ..... and SO good that you got to go on your cruise!!  

Yep, telling family & friends, really sucks. I kept everyone informed on my progress via a group email & everyone knew that I may not reply to all their individual replies ..... you will find a method that suits you.  Talking about it to everyone just becomes 'too much', sometimes.

Take care and all the best with your surgery next week xxx

@Vonniejoy Initially, I told my family, my boss and 2 key friends and asked them to spread the word but not to contact me.  A few weeks later, I started a blog to keep everyone updated and gave the details out.  It turned into both a diary and a thought-sorter for me as the year went by.

Welcome, and yes, I'm sorry you've had to join us. I found telling people just ghastly and too confronting for words (terrible family history with this disease). I got my husband to do a lot of the heavy lifting on that front, and found WhatsApp to be very useful... Do what works for you and try not to worry about it. You're the most important person right now. Be kind to yourself. K xox

Hi and welcome. The waiting is the hardest part and yes telling those you love and needing to reassure them whilst terrified inside. Kath x

Welcome @Vonniejoy Not where you want to be but we're in it together.

Thanks soldiercrab I have found  it really useful so far, rather not be here, but think I am going to find it helpful 🌷