Feel like my head is spinning

Mima

Hi, I've been newly diagnosed on 20/12 too.
am feeling very overwhelmed too.
my head is spinning
See the surgeon on Saturday 
part of me wants to get it over as quick as possible and part of me wants to forget it ever happened

Mima

Have been told lumpectomy with radiation is an acceptable option
hope this is right way to go
spoke with bcnurse today and she has organised my journey kit
not sure what next few months will bring

InkPetal

We will all be here if you need to vent, talk things through, or ask questions. I saw your post in the other thread before I saw this one! Sorry. Let's talk here.

I wasn't feeling very confident with my decision (re: "hope this is the right way to go") either, but I think at the time it was more because everything felt so rushed. I don't know if we're ever really solid on that, all we can do it make the most informed decision possible and trust our professional team.

The chaos should calm down over the next few months but it'll be hectic for a while. It's a blip you'll never forget, but it'll pass and things will settle.

Karenhappyquilter

Sorry for your bad news.  Not having to have chemo is a blessing.  For me radiation was much easier.  Not a walk in the park but definitely easier than chemo.  A lumpectomy is easier to recover from than a mastectomy too.  So some good news.  Good luck with your treatment.  

I found that I didn't really come to terms with my cancer diagnosis until after I had finished treatment and started to recover.  It was all so quick in the beginning and I was in a state of shock, I had never expected to get cancer and felt overwhelmed by it and the extensive treatment I faced.  I didn't feel unwell, it was picked up early.  So it was unreal and at the same time frightening.  But time is a great healer, but it takes time.  For now, take it one day at a time.  We are so lucky to live in Australia with high level health care.   Karen  

Mima

Feel like I'm on a merrygoround and can't get off
Know it is new but feel like I am being assaulted
Hate the thought of surgery and radiotherapy
Maybe I am scared and feel guilty
My kids don't know how to handle it so are avoiding it pretty much
My daughter is coming on Saturday
Trouble is I'm the one to solve the problem in the family usually but I don't have an answer for this...

Nadi

Hi Mima. So sorry you found yourself here. The feelings when you are first diagnosed are so overwhelming. I cried every day for 2 whole weeks when I first got the news. My sons 21,18 and 16 didn't know how to feel or react so they pretended nothing was happening for the first little while. Mothers are often the linchpin of the family so a diagnosis can throw everything into a loop as breast cancer is something we can't fix. I too had a lumpectomy and radiation. The surgery ended up so much better than I thought it would be but I understand you feeling 'assaulted'. Once everything gets going you'll find that these overwhelming thoughts calm down. Until then just take deep breaths. If you have any questions about surgery or radiation that aren't covered in the My Journey Kit, come on here and we will do our best to answer them. Wishing you all the best for your appointment with the surgeon. Take someone with you and ask a lot of questions. Sending hugs

Nadine

Mima

Thank you Nadine
off to work
hope i can put thoughts aside or few hours being with clients
have only had about 3 hours sleep

Share

Mima, all of the feelings you have described are totally "normal" for what is an abnormal situation - bc diagnosis.

All the ladies here on the forum can totally relate to being confused, having head spins, tears, frustration, sleepless nights - all of these and more.

I am sure that until your diagnosis you had perhaps felt well and so a diagnosis that you have breast cancer is completely shocking and overwhelming. In some respects, a lumpectomy and radiotherapy is something that is not as invasive as a mastectomy and chemotherapy but regardless this is happening to your body and I am sure you feel as though your body has let you down.

Like @Nadi I am the mother of boys and Mum's seem to be the glue that holds a family together. Not only do you feel helpless that you can't fix it for yourself, you also can't fix it for your family.

No need to feel guilty and perfectly ok and normal to feel scared and frightened.

Knowledge is everything - ask lots of questions, take a relative or friend to appointments, your BCNA kit should be really helpful and most of all there is the online forum here.

Best wishes to you.

Sheryl xx

melclarity

HI Mima! So sorry to hear your news and find yourself here! So have you had the lumpectomy? this will absolutely give you definitive pathology, only from here can they determine your treatment. It can be so very overwhelming especially at this early stage, just try and think of some questions before hand. In 5.5yrs of my BC journey Ive never had anyone attend appointments only once or twice whilst I did chemo, so its really hard! The interesting thing you mentioned about you being the one who always solves the problems in the family. I can say this was always me as well, and all of a sudden the tables turn in which I found I had to learn to put ME above everyone else and they had to step up. Its not that they can't but when youre a Mum you are the hub and the nurturer. So part of my journey was learning that for me, and it was eye opening and welcoming! Lovely you have the love and support, stay strong, but all will be much clearer once you have diagnosis from the lumpectomy. Big Hugs Melinda xo

adean

Hi lm 4.5 years down the track but yes l remember no sleep before the surgery. Once you start you sort of feel in control as something is actualy happening. I found the radiation very tiring but was very stubborn and tried to behave like wonder woman. My only regret was l was not kind enough to myself with taking time of and accepting help. Cancer changes you for me lve become more layback. But the good is the marvelous ladies ive met. Heres hoping all is good for you. Adean xxxx

Mima

I have 3 girls and a boy 25-31 ,years
Know the girls are also worried for themselves
Dr doesn't think it hereditary though.
Haven't had lumpectomy yet have first appt with surgeon officially on Saturday
Saw him at the breast clinic
Hope he can tell me when surgery will be then

melclarity

Hi Mima! Im sure you'll be able to schedule that with the Surgeon when you see them. So that will be one step done! Its so hard prior to the results to not imagine all the sorts of treatments, but youre doing great! and just remind yourself one thing at a time, I found I could handle things a little better when I tackled it that way, otherwise it can be so overwhelming. 95% of BC is not hereditary. Certainly alot of ladies on here can share their experiences in regards to having the BRCA Gene or not. Theres a wealth of information and experience amongst the wonderful ladies here! So anything you think of, ask away, Im sure someone will have some help. Hugs xo Melinda 

Mima

Everyone says to ask questions 
what questions should I ask on Saturday when i see the surgeon besides when he will do it  please?
am not sure what to ask

Afraser

Apart from what to ask, it's really helpful if someone not so involved can go with you to write things down. When it's all strange, new and scary, It's easy to forget to ask and even easier to forget the answers! 
Immediate questions are when and where, how long you will be in hospital, what to take with you and not take. I had a mastectomy and therefore no radiation (had chemo) and I really had very little pain after surgery. Others on this site can advise better than me about the next stages. Hard as it may be, deal with one problem at a time, otherwise you can get a bit swamped. When surgery is over, and you are feeling you can handle that bit, that's the time to start thinking about your next treatment. And let people help you - you may have been the family fixer, but people can and do step up when needed. As you get your head around treatment, you can pick up again but some free head space now is important. Best wishes for your appointment.

Chorsell

Some of the immediate questions might be around your lumpectomy surgery, when it is, where will the incision be, information about your recovery like how long you will be in hospital and off work....  Final decisions about treatment may not be made until they get the pathology from your lumpectomy. Ask for a copy of the report,  ask about any restrictions that you may need to consider and the process around your treatment - many hospitals have a specific process around how treatment decisions are made.

Thats a start - you are bound to think of more....

all the best for your appointment 

Chris

Mima

Thank you ladies
Hard to get my head around what to ask so confusing at present