The Beginning
Noooooo, I can't believe I just lost all I had written before it had posted........Aaarrgggggh!!!! Can I be bothered starting again - I'll try.....
Although I have been a member here for a while I have resisted till now about introducing myself & fully utilising this site. I'll also give a brief rundown of when I was diagnosed.
Firstly, my name is Cheryl & I am nearing my 1yr anniversary of my initial diagnosis. I have had a left breast lumpectomy & sential node biopsy, full left breast mastectomy & removal of remaining lymph nodes, 6 courses of chemotherapy & now on 5yrs of hormonal therapy.
I was diagnosed with early stage Breast Cancer on 28th July 2010 at the age of 55, just 5 days before my 56th birthday, after my routine Mammogram at the Breastscreen Van revealed an abnormality that required further investigation. I've been having regular bi-yearly mammograms as my mother was diagnosed in about 1990 & subsequently died Jun 1994 of secondary BC. she was only 58.
I'd just come home from a day out on Friday 24th Jul 2010 to a message on my phone requesting me to ring a certain person at a certain number urgently, neither of which I recognised. I was getting a lot of unsolicited calls at the time & was tempted to just delete it BUT something/someone in my head told me to ring the number back. I'd completely forgotten about my mammogram a week or so earlier, as you do when done, so was unsuspecting.
A lovely lady from BreastScreen "invited" me (gotta love that term LOL) to attend their Adelaide rooms for more tests as an abnormality had been found on the Xrays which they wanted to clarify. The date was set at Wednesday 28th Jul 2010.
I was a little taken aback that the scans had revealed an abnormality but not overly surprised as I had felt a lump a couple months before. As my mammogram was coming up soon I didn't do anything about it as I felt sure it was nothing too serious - putting myself in DENIAL....sound familiar??
So! I arrive at my appointment on the Wednesday, having driven myself down to Adelaide (about 1 1/2hr drive).
After seeing Dr, further Xrays, seeing Dr, Ultrasound & fine needle biopsy (ouch that hurt), seeing Dr & getting diagnosis, options & information, I finally left sometime just before peak hour traffic to start the drive home. There were no tears, no screaming, no nothing - it all felt surreal, like it was happening to someone else and I was the observer. (reading on here I see it's quite a common reaction)
At home that night I was trying to work out how to tell my kids, siblings & father. I told my partner when he got home & I'm not really sure he fully understood the situation, though he vowed to remain with me & support me. (yeah right - he left on the 4th Dec 2010 & I've been alone ever since)
Decided I would tell the kids on the Saturday night after tea but when I went to invite them on the Thursday, my daughter & DIL both demanded to know what was going on as they knew I'd had my mammogram earlier in the month so I was forced to "fess up" before I felt ready, telling them both that night. My eldest & youngest sons were told on the Friday when I could get them both together in the one place. I'd rung my father & rang my sister & remaining brother that night. So now my immediate family knew.
As luck would have it, telling my kids when I did was fortunate, as in the early hours of Saturday morning the 31st July 2010, the kids' stepmother passed away in hospital from secondary breast cancer. I found out when my daughter and her partner rocked up on my doorstep early Sunday morning in another fit of tears. I felt so helpless & guilty at the same time as I held her & comforted her as best I could. The kids got a double whammy that week..... :(
So here we are today, my tastebuds are almost normal, I feel for the most part almost normal, and I'm finally admitting to myself & all of you that I DO need help, support & love from others who have or are going through the same journey. Family and friends are great of course but lack that empathy you find from someone who is or has "been there, done that".
Looking forward to spending more time getting to know my fellow "comrades in arms".
