Patience with 'New Normal'

great suggestion Jessica about the complain session.  Seems to be something that I have started today, with a very close friend to say what scares me now.

Thanks Deanne - I have made small short term goals and spoken to my counselor and friends and things seem to be improving.  Still wake like I have run a marathon, and yes trying to bury the what if thoughts.   Just find my emotions are also very shallow these days.

I know there are a few members from the Get active and keep well group already responding to this post (which is great!), I just wanted to invite you to join the Get active and keep well group. It's a great space to share your experiences, advice and tips. It's proving to be a really supportive environment so have a read and see what you think. I thought you might also like to know we have a couple of resources available - healthy eating and exercise and breast cancer. These resources provide really practical information and guidance around reintroducing exercise back into your routine X Steph

Hi, Yes I think we can all relate to "you are doing so well". Yes i too got a tad peeved with it as from my perspective I was far from where I wanted to be. Just remember everyone sees things from a different perspective and generally the "you are doing so well" comment is said with genuine sincerity and the reality of it is that you are most likely doing extremely well given the situation.

I too was very active prior to diagnosis and really struggled mentally with my social life or perhaps the new limitations put on it. The majority of my friends and I participated socially in active recreational activities that after BC I could no longer do. As I lost fitness they just appeared to be getting fitter. I found this really hard to deal with.

I am now 2 years post active treatment, still not fit, but yesterday I commenced a training program to start running with my aim to be to run the Mothers Day Classic. I have struggled to walk it in the past 2 years, but am feeling good that I have set myself the goal and am feeling strong enough to achieve it. I am not telling my friends about my new training program or goal as I want to surprise them by turning up to the Mothers Day Classis and running it with them. In the past years I have walked it whilst they have run it.

It has been at the 2 year post active treatment stage that I am beginning to feel more like my old self. I will also be returning to work this week, but just 2 days per week initially.

Sorry no hints as it can only come from you. All I can say is don't be too hard on yourself, listen to your body yet gently keep pushing yourself to discover your new limits. And enjoy life.

All the best,

Helen.

 I should add that David guided my 34yr ord daughter in how to safely and quickly return to her pole dancing classed after  her breast cancer scare and surgery  just as I started chemo. (She had two lumps removed, a chunk the size of a matchbox and a half from smallish breasts, turned out to not be cancer thank heavens). He told her what she could and should do and also what to avoid doing and what to build up and how.

Ever thought of pole-dancing? It makes the body incredibly fit and strong all over!

cheers

Jessica

 I should add that David guided my 34yr ord daughter in how to safely and quickly return to her pole dancing classed after  her breast cancer scare and surgery  just as I started chemo. (She had two lumps removed, a chunk the size of a matchbox and a half from smallish breasts, turned out to not be cancer thank heavens). He told her what she could and should do and also what to avoid doing and what to build up and how.

Ever thought of pole-dancing? It makes the body incredibly fit and strong all over!

cheers

Jessica

Hi, I know a great physio in Midland, David Bryde, at North Street Medical centre. I know that is a fair way to go, but you may not need to see him all that often, and I think he might be really useful to you to guide you on your way.

David was a professional tennis player and he traveled with high-level sports teams as their physio. He knows a great deal about returning to full fitness after injury or illness. I drew on his expertise after 3 knee injuries in 15 months,(medial meniscus left knee, then medial meniscul right knee, then medial collateral ligiment right knee). I had no surgery, and no cortisone injections, but I had to do the right exercises regularly plus stationery bike at the gym to build up the correct musclesjust above the knee.

Unlike some physios who just seem to work on things with no particular clear stated goal in mind, he set me up with an ongoing process to get me back to full functioning with stronge healthy knees again over the course of a year. He also explains things very well, eg advised me to get a knee brace that did not fully extend and that totally prevented sideways movement because that would prevent further injury and speed up healing enormously..

He would be able to guide you in how to realistically work from being quite unfit and also quite limited by fatigue or whatever you are limited by. And to have a plan that helps you know how to decide what you can do on a particular day and also see your way to the longer term goal. He may also know about the type of exercise that would get your white blood cells and red blood cells production up.

Nice to hear you have weathered the journey ok. BTW, with friends can you tell them you want a complain session today, ie someone who can hear you complain for ten to twenty minutes flat and not try to brush it off, just listen, empathise and understand. When my son was going through a bad time he trained me to be his complaint-listener. But without training, I did not know that was what he needed. If you trust them enough, tell them" I know you are trying to help encourage me and be positive, but right now I need you to hear how crappy and scared I feel and how I miss the structures of my life I have lost."

best wishes

Jessica