Scan day freaking sucks......yet again. Probable curse words included.
With only minor trepidation and my shit mostly together I went to clinic today to get my results. I stopped to give a co worker that had just been diagnosed (MOFO BC) a hug and a shoulder to cry on for a bit while we were waiting. I heard my name called and promised her she would get through and I would be happy to help if I could in any way. She thanked me with that smile you put on when you are trying so hard not to burst into tears and your heart is aching as I waltzed on in to the doctors office. Well the whole thing went sideways and turned into me leaving work in a shaky, teary eyed mess. My goodness this thing still rocks you when least expect it. Here we go again with another fucking ambiguous result about the mystical eliptical thingamajjigy that has taken up residence in the rogue boob. Said thingy has decided to grow 2mm in 6 months. BIRAIDS score now moved up from a 3 to a 4 and hey lets poke a needle in it this time. This presents a problem. Considering the MRI is still the only machine that can see thingy (again it can't be felt by anyone either) and it's positioning, it is probable that a biopsy can't be done in the MRI machine. Still waiting on an answer for that one. So do we just poke around in there and try to hit it?? Cut it out or off just for the heck of it? No body is prepared to say it is anything sinister nor are they prepared to say it's not. Seriously, can someone please tell me how, for the love of god, you can have 4 MRI's, 4 mammograms and 6 u/sounds in a period of 12 months and still not know what this is or isn't. So as it sits, back to headlining the MDT on Thursday to get input from group of guru's as quote "my breast don't scan normally". Another targetted u/s on Friday. And wait for an answer on whether the biopsy can be done by MRI. Waiting waiting waiting yet again. Fuckity fuck fuck. I am sick of this roller coaster. I want to get off and my money back. Mental status right now = somewhere between zoned out numbness and seriously pissed off. Strongly considering ostrich tactics at the moment. Thanks for listening. :/
Yearly check up
Hello lovely Ladies Yesterday I went for my 1st mammogram after BC . Before going to the specialist next week. All last week was up and down. I was so nervous. So got called by a lovely young lady and told her I was anxious when asked how I was instead of my usual Yeah I am fine. Had the Mammogram waited as we normally do but she came back and said that her and the Dr had looked at last years and this years and said that there is NO change to my only breast. Phew. Going by last years test which were at the same place, I know that if there is something wrong they don't say anything. This was a huge plus for me. I am not sure that the lovely Radiologist was supposed to tell me anything but I am so glad she did. I will now go and see the Specialist next week feeling a lot better. Just a thought tho. How many of you ladies have gone and had these what seem like endless Scans etc and just wish the person there would tell you something anything to make you feel better. I know this young lady made me feel better yesterday. Jan xx
Got the all clear from first mamogram
yippeee j have been laying low as I was quite stressed however just got all clear. HD meeting with dr Mann and he was efficient and informative. Doesn’t recommend gene testing at the moment until it becomes free unless I want to pay. He said within next few years he believes it will be free to all. I feel a massive relief.