Anniversary
Today is the first anniversary of my mammogram. I was pretty stony faced. Nine months before my sister had died from breast cancer and I was resentful of the inefficiency at the front desk, the pink positivity messages and images plastered everywhere, and the long wait, despite the fact I had an appointment. I was asked if I wanted to take part in a study comparing detection results between 2D and 3D mammograms. I'd be randomly assigned. Always happy to be part of a medical study I said yes. I got 2D. It was a shabby shabby building, not a nice environment. The woman doing the mammogram was professional. Serious, but pleasant enough. She made small talk about kids, mine, hers. I get it, but I really didn't want to talk. I just wanted it over and done with, to get the hell out of that dingy place. The mammogram was uncomfortable but no more than that. As I was getting dressed she said sorry, I just need to do one more. Why? The image is a bit blurred, it's not unusual, the plates might have shifted slightly. Bra off and back I went. After it was all done she wished me good luck. Why? With the teenagers she said. Oh yes, you too. I left, recovered my mood and congratulated myself on getting it done, how efficient and good I am. Virtuous even... The boob she re-imaged (blurred image my foot) was the right one with the tumour in it, and three weeks later I knew what the good luck wishes meant. It's weird how the anniversaries of trauma are unsettling. I mean, time is a manmade construct and it's just another day determined by how long our planet takes to travel round the sun, right? I mentioned it to the psych on Thursday and she said the memories trigger our nervous systems to 'remember' as well, and we physically relive our response. I don't have trauma round that mammogram, but three weeks from now I won't be able to say 'this time last year I was happy' etc. My naive innocence was about to end and as I approach that time I am feeling unsettled by it. I theory my life is better now. I'm certainly healthier with, as far as I'm aware, a body free of cancer. However in fact, I'm sadder, sorer, mutilated, diminished and more tired. It's difficult to feel it's a victory. I hope the second anniversaries are better than the first ones. How are your anniversaries?
So much for good vibes. Scan day sucked . They've called me back.
This may come out not making sense as I am somewhere in between being scared shitless and f*/#&%g furious. So after the mammogram and u/sound the doctor popped her head in (obviously they could see I was starting to freak out) and said there was no changes to last years scans. Gave me a smile and said goodbye. Phew. I was feeling quite positive after that until the receptionist rang and said I needed to come back for another targeted ultra sound as the MRI had picked up something. The other two hadn't, yet again! Oh and the doctor wanted me to go tomorrow and follow her to their other facility as she is only in Ipswich on Thursdays and wanted to talk to me. So my head is in a mess and the tears are starting, my heart is pounding and I've got the shakes. I don't know if I can do all that again. I know I am over thinking and not to freak out totally before I know for sure. But FAAARRRKKK this shit,
So ... I received a Breastscreen NSW reminder for my 2 yearly mammogram!
Who else has received their Mammogram Reminder after being diagnosed & treated? Last week, I was a bit surprised to receive a reminder to have my 2 yearly mammogram as I thought there might be some sort of communication between the various health professionals & the organisation .... then again - why WOULD they know about my ILC BC? So far, I've received a written letter, an email & an SMS to my mobile phone - so they are really keen to get me back!! I thought a letter explaining why I wouldn't be going back would be in order. This is what I wrote. I'll let you know if I get a reply!! Hi guys, I’ve received my reminder for a mammogram, but I was diagnosed with invasive lobular cancer 6 months after my previous mammogram, which wasn’t picked up by it. There is no breast cancer (or any cancer) in my family, so this was (and still is) a real shock to me. I’ve had surgery (Jan 2018) and also radiation and am now on hormone tablets for the next 5 years+. Apparently I have dense breast tissue, but I wasn’t advised of this by Breastscreen NSW and that it would be beneficial to have an ultrasound for earlier and better detection rates. Breast Screen Western Australia advises their clients with dense breast tissue to do this. It is time for Breastscreen NSW to do the same. I will be having yearly mammograms and ultrasounds as a part of my ongoing breast cancer management, so would request that you remove my name from your reminder lists. I only hope that I am not one of the 30% who then randomly go on to develop metastasised/Stage 4 breast cancer, irrelevant of the ‘good outcome’ of my surgery, Rads and tabs. It really is a lottery. Much more research is needed in this area, to determine WHO will get Stage 4 and WHY? Tissue and bloods should be taken from all having surgery, to provide material for researchers to work with! I would be interested if a radiographer could take a closer look at my last mammograms with Breastscreen NSW in 2017 ... to see if, in hindsight, anything could be detected on them, now that we know it was there all along? It was in my right breast. What do you reckon? Not too rude??
Painful mammogram and now recall for suspicious lump
Hi there, I'm not sure where to put this as I haven't as yet been diagnosed, but I'm terribly anxious and feeling very alone. I had a mammogram a week ago and still feeling very painful from it. Tingling in breasts and feeling hot in the chest. After I had it I did a bit more reading up and feel like I should have just done an ultrasound as it was a routine check and I'm 42. I called BreastScreen QLD to report it and kind of complain, but then they said oh, you are on our list to call back to check a lump. I had noted it before my scan. I had my first mammogram about 3 years ago with no effects, no pain and nothing suspicious. The next appointment is on Wednesday and I just want to be armed with as much info as possible as I had concerns about the mammogram when I was there but really feel like I was pushed into it when I was there because I didn't have enough info about how painful it might be and the radiation (which I'm wondering whether it has caused the heat). I keep trying to examine the lump and google all the different types, but it seems to change depending on the position I'm in. It definitely feels hard, but sometimes it feels like it's moveable, sometimes it even feels larger than just a few hours before, and I can't really tell the shape. I've been reading up on different options they might take at the appointment, which is ultrasound, which I'm fine with, fine needle aspiration or core biopsy. They also said diagnostic mammogram which I definitely DO NOT want to do. I appreciate that there hasn't even been a diagnosis yet, and maybe this isn't the most appropriate forum, but I'm super anxious and just need to speak to people who understand. Can anyone share their experiences on the different diagnoses methods? Which is the safest option without radiation or drugs? Thank you in advance.
I'm not impressed!
TL;DR - If you are a patient at public hospital in Brisbane, check your mammogram & ultrasound appointments. They may no longer be there. I had my second year mammogram and ultrasound today. It sounds so simple! I was diagnosed in late February 2018 by (private breast clinic) and referred immediately by my GP to a public hospital as they have a great reputation for dealing with breast cancer. And at the time, yes, they were fantastic. I was seen within about 2 weeks (on a Monday) and a week later I was admitted and have my lumpectomy on the next Monday. Wonderful! Public system at its finest! Nasty tumour ripped out, sentinel node biopsied. All good. I was assigned a breast care nurse (2 actually who job shared) and had follow ups with the surgeon and visited the Breast and Endocrine Clinic as required. Fantastic! Delays to appointment times but meh, it is what it is. No complaints. In March 2019 I had my first annual check up. Queried the technician about getting a 3D mammogram. Apparently the machine has the capability of doing this but no one was prepared to pay for the licence to activate it and turn it on. Had an ultrasound - technician noted a couple of cysts but nothing concerning. Had the follow up appointment for test results at the BE Clinic. Saw a random doctor who claimed to be some kind of breast specialist. I was also told I'd never see my surgeon again. She said the report was all clear. Yay! Great news! However, when I specifically asked about cysts, she said oh no, there aren't any. Hmmm suspicions raised. I asked about breast density. She couldn't give me a definitive answer. I asked what stage was my cancer (knowing it was Grade 3 but not stage). Oh, the response was, we don't use stages any more. Uh really??? Totally forgot at the time to ask for a copy of the report. When I followed up about a week later, breast care nurses said, not our problem. Email these people. So I dutifully emailed my request and heard nothing. And still heard nothing. Followed up 2 weeks later to be told they had never received the original request. <cough bulls*t> Eventually got the report and it was a drawing with some scribbles on it. Not exactly a professional document. So 2 days ago, I was mentally prepping for my exam this year and received a phone call from Qld XRay at 5 pm the day before my exam saying they are going to schedule my annual appointment. WTF? Apparently the public hospital have outsourced their mammograms and ultrasounds to Qld XRay and did this in November 2019 and obviously didn't tell anyone. Qld XRay also thought my appointment was 4 April and not 4 March. I told her, no no no, it's definitely 4 March and I'm holding the appointment letter in my hands right now. Of course, no availability on 4 March so I was rescheduled to 5 March. Not too bad, just one day delay. I can cope. But how furious I would have been if I'd turned up at the public hospital to find out it had been cancelled with no notice. Thank goodness I did get the phone call. So today I rock up to Qld XRay and I am very impressed that the first thing they do is give me a 3D mammogram. No mucking around with old 2D stuff. Excellent!! Ultrasound very thorough and I'm totally on board with the lovely staff. And the best thing is you have access to a Qld XRay online portal and can see your images within a few hours! No report thought until you've seen a doctor, then it becomes available. Anyway, they contacted the public hospital to get copies of last year's scans and results and hospital promptly tells them that they have no record of me. That there are no scans or results in their system. Are you #(*&ing kidding me? This after receiving a text message today reminding me of my follow up appointment at the hospital for next Monday. So Qld XRay has had to send off requests on my behalf to private breast Clinic and Breast Screen Qld (where I had a couple of scans done about 6-7 years ago) to try and source comparison scans. All of which is going to delay my report getting to my various doctors. So the public hospital - not good enough!!! Not happy at all. I don't know what's happened there over the last 1-2 years but something's not right internally. I shall be very interested to see what happens at my appointment at the BE Clinic next Monday. Sorry for this long and ranting post but I just had to vent. We rely on this stuff to go smoothly.
Started swearing!
Hi to all you amazingly lovely ladies! Was reluctant to share my story but feel I need to even if it is just to rant for some relief! I was diagnosed 2nd Dec with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma grade 2 following a routine mammogram. What a whirlwind! I thought the Dr was talking to 'someone else'..I have had so many emotions since. After reading others posts, I feel slightly 'normal' The main emotions are anger & sadness. I have tried to do all the right things with my health (all natural products, etc) no family history so it really was a shock. I am struggling with the person I am at the moment..I have always been an upbeat, positive, bubbly person but now am moody, teary and have started swearing!! Also, to add to my woes, I finished my permanent job a couple of weeks before the diagnoses (they sold the business) and I am currently working as an enrolled nurse casually therefore lost all my sick leave (had 2 sickies in 5.5 years) bugga! Ok, that off my chest.. I think I am slowly coming to grips with it as there really is no choice. So I have had all the 'staging' done last week and go back for results of that tomorrow. Then waiting for the lumpectomy/lymph node surgery which is now listed for 10th Jan even though is listed as 'urgent'! Grrr.. Christmas slows everything down. Then there's the ongoing radiotherapy etc. etc. The waiting is definitely the WORST!! I want this thing out of me, get on with it all so I can get on with my life. I know I am an impatient patient!! I know there are thousand's of women who have gone through the same thing.. Please dont get me wrong.. I am VERY grateful for the medical system we have, they have been very thorough and it is early diagnoses with a good prognosis etc I also have a wonderful husband who is very supportive so for that I am truly grateful. After reading some other ladies stories, it makes me feel i'm being selfish, It certainly helps me not feel so sorry for myself at all. I'm sure I will find positiveness through this time (it is NOT a journey, as a journey is usually a pleasant holiday) lol It is early days..I hope my next post I will be a bit more upbeat as I find the old Lisa returning! :wink: To all my fellow BC 'sisters', I wish you all the very best and appreciate this great private place where we can all chat. X
to biopsy or not
I have recently found a lump (2 months ago) which I initially thought was due to my cycle but soon realized that even after my periods the lump still remained. I went to my doctor who then referred me for a mammogram and ultrasound. I arrived for my appt where I was told they weren't really keen on giving me a mammogram due to my age (36) and thought it best just to do the ultrasound, so I had the ultrasound and then started to get dressed, as i was doing so the radiologist told me not to bother as she thinks it would be best to do a Mammogram now. (after this i realised that they must of spotted something on the ultrasound). So i had the mammogram also on the same day. A few days later i went to see my GP for the results and was told they had seen dilated ducts with soft tissue present in my left breast and the radiology doctor has suggested a biopsy. My GP rang the radiology centre to speak to the Dr who wrote up my report and confirm whether it would be a FNA or Core biopsy, to which he confirmed a Core biopsy. A week later I went for my core biopsy appt at the same place i had mammo/ultrasound. Once again they decided to do a quick ultrasound and called the on duty Dr in to view. i was then told by this Dr (not the same guy that wrote up my initial report) that they wouldn't be doing the biopsy as he didn't see it as necessary. So didn't end up having any type of biopsy done on the lump. I now am very confused and worried that something has been missed as i can still feel the lump (it feels like a small rock covered in gravel) I have an appt with my GP next Tuesday but am unsure of what he is going to say. Im a single mother with 2 children and don't feel comfortable waiting a few months to see if the lump grows but i am unsure if i should get a second opinion or even where to go to get one. I have also reviewed the initial mammo/ultrasound report where the Dr states a biopsy is suggested. it also states that i have heterogeneously dense breasts whish makes it harder to spot any calcifications or masses on mammogram. Im confused as they obviously spotted something on the first ultrasound to warrant them wanting to do a mammo after firstly saying they didn't think it was needed .Scanxiety
Definitions. scanxiety rate. the tension which builds particulary amongst those who have or have had cancer as they move towards their regular check up scan, hyperscanxiety being the period as they await results I am sensible and know better than to get wound up by it, but hey every time the date is pending, this Friday, it starts all over again, pings and pangs, twinges et cetera
Uncertain diagnosis
hello. I have been diagnosed with cancer, but they are taking what feels like an eternity to determine the type of cancer (most likely breast). This is the timeline of my lump. Wed 21 Feb 2018 - found lump underarm Thurs 1 March 2018 - Had lump examined by GP. Referred for ultrasound with FNA/mammogram if warranted. But told it was likely a reactive lymph node and could wait a week or so to see if it would go away on its own. Friday 8 March 2018 - lump still there. No bigger, but no smaller. Make appointment for ultrasound. Tues 20 March 2018 - Ultrasound and FNA - suspicious spot seen on ultrasound at 3 o’clock in addition to lump. Friday 23 March 2018 - cancer diagnosis - unknown type - -ve for P and E - lump could be cancer filled lymph node or primary medullary tumour -pathology requested core biopsy for clarification. Friday 23 March 2018 - mammogram to look for spot seen on ultrasound - clear Tues 27 March 2018 - core biopsy on underarm lump I saw my doctor today and she said that she can’t make an appointment with a surgeon or oncologist until the core biopsy results come back this Thursday, and it will likely take two weeks before I will get an initial appointment! This seems crazy to me. I am 32 years old, meaning my cancer is likely to be more aggressive and is possibly in my lymph nodes. I thought they would be rushing to have everything figured out. How long has it taken others between initial diagnosis and their first appointment with a specialist? I am going through the public system in Canberra. Should I have a breast cancer nurse to advocate for my treatment? thanks for reading, if you got this far!!
