Hi Jenny & Jo
I'm quite torn as to whether to reply or not .. I don't want to be negative at this time in your treatment. If you don't have anything positive to say then don't say anything at all, right?!
I am also 46, however I have already been through 2 lumpectomies (unsuccessful), axilary clearance (now lymphedema), 5 mths of chemotherapy, bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. I am now over 12mths on from my last surgery (originally diagnosed ILC BCa in July 2012). Well, actually, I'm just out of surgery again, but that was for a heart condition! (ICD pacemaker surgery) Despite how that sounds I am a very fit and healthy woman.
I think that being "forced" into menopause rather than going into it naturally does mean it's a bit of a tough time. I can honestly say that it is something that I am struggling with. The hot flushes are unpleasant, but for me it has been more about the loss of "me". The combination of having lost my breasts (and nipples), along with menopausal changes in sexual response and desires, as well as the massive sweats; is something that I am still trying to come to terms with for myself and my physical relationship with my husband. He is very understanding, and I suppose in some ways it has made our emotional connection stronger but we have always had a very healthy sex life and I know that it must be disappointing to him, as it is to me, that things are simply no longer the same.
It sounds so petty to complain about pleasures when I am very grateful for life and to have come out the other side of my breast cancer with a relatively clean bill of health. I definitely don't want to sound ungrateful for that - and I do what we all do ... make the most of what we've got. But there are certainly times when I mourn for my former self.
Ok. That's enough of the negative. On the positive - I want to let you know that it is all very doable! I have come through and now have a full head of hair again, along with eyelashes & eyebrows! (the only positive about chemo was not needing to shave my legs!). I am enjoying exercise, working and generally being ALIVE. Menopause is something that we all have to go through at some time, it's just that in our situation we have to go through it a little earlier and "bang" all at once. I, too, will be very glad to be on the other side of it. I can't yet tell you how long it will last ... I guess that's different for everyone.
Good luck to you both. Please be reassured that while there are times that you are likely to feel very wretched ... there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you will look back on it all later and be amazed at yourselves.
LLxx
