Out of the Cave

Thanks, Trace. My husband is home safe, well and grateful that he got to say goodbye properly to someone that he loved. It is kind of you to ask ??

I'm glad I was honest with my oncologist and told him how I was feeling instead of my usual reaction to questioning which is to smile and say 'I'm fine'.

I was so shocked that I reacted badly to chemo. I convinced myself that I'd be fine and struggled with feeling so bad. It was bad enough without me beating myself up about things that were out of my control and I refuse to do that to myself again. I have been fighting since my diagnosis without any thought to the consequences of that. I have finally given in and accepted that I need treatment and I need help and I need to figure out how to be nicer to myself to get through it! 

So now I rest. I say "no" to my family sometimes. I take painkillers if I need them and sleeping tablets if necessary. I stay in my jammies a bit later some days and take a break just for reading time in the afternoons. And amazingly the world has kept on turning ??