Hi everybodyI was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer in April 2016.I am on three weekly Herceptin and Perjeta plus Letrozole.I have tumours in both breasts, in lymph and lungsIts good to be here.My main problem is fear.

No worries @Bird. Do you have psychologist or counsellor? I know they're not for everyone. I was hesitant but desperately needed help so took the plunge. I've found it very helpful. I see a community funded psychologist (so affordable) who's been treating breast cancer patients for 12 years. There's nothing she hasn't heard. If this is a path you want to pursue, ask all your medical team who they'd recommend. It's important to find someone you 'click' with, so it might take some time to find the right person.Do you have a BreastCare Nurse? They can be incredible, and a great resource. Can you talk to her as often as you need? Do you feel better when you do?Staying in the moment is a key for managing fear. Easy to say but harder to do! BC brought me to meditation, via apps on my phone. There are lots out there; I settled on Headspace. The guy who does this had cancer himself so brings an understanding to his practice. There's even a mediation pack there for cancer.I'm not very good at meditating but it does do something. I find it hard to define, but each time it seems to create some space in my head that wasn't there 15 minutes earlier. And it does tell and teach you to stay in the moment, to take one day at a time, focus on the moment, to stay in it.Activities that occupy your mind are good. Playing music uses both sides of your brain; hard to think of anything else when you're playing an instrument.Good old fashioned relaxation, and distraction. Many find doing a big puzzle great for this! I found the distraction of a (not too heavy) TV show to be the only thing that helped me when I was frantic and distraught at the beginning of this BC experience. Anything to not be all up in my head and emotions.Are you a religious person? I'm not, but I know talking frequently to a minister brought my sister great comfort.I am not in your position and would never presume to know how it feels. What I do know is that no one knows the date of their death. It is good for all of us to focus on staying in the moment, to live our lives one day at a time, and make the most of every one of those days. Be kind to yourself, accept help, surround yourself with friends and family, or seek solitude if that's what you need. One foot in front of the other, and breathe deeply. Big, big hugs. K xox

Hi BirdI’m aso new here. But it seems like the place to be. Was motivated to join after going to the Pink Lady lunch in Sydney yesterday. I did most my treatment in Singapore so was a bit out of touch with the resources and support available in Australia. Best wishes Rachael x

hi Bird and Rachel sorry to have to welcome you into the forum.... do you have the hopes and hurdles kit ? https://www.bcna.org.au/resources/ and do you know about the group Living with Metastatic Cancer? http://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/group/2-living-with-metastatic-breast-cancer Below are a couple of links to help you find your way around the forum and also how to find a breast care nurse and how to order a MY journey Kit if you haven't got one yet. It can be a a whirlwind when we first get a diagnosed.... Breathe and take it one step at a time. The what and how thread.http://onlinenetwork.bcna.org.au/discussion/14879/the-what-and-how-thread/p1 Breast Care Nurseshttps://www.mcgrathfoundation.com.au/OurMission/OurNurses/FindANurse.aspx My Journey Kits and other resources. Hopes and Hurdles https://www.bcna.org.au/resources/BCNA Helpline 1800 500 258If you have any questions, concerns or require any further information or support please call 1800 500 258. The Helpline is open Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 9 am till 5 pm EST and Tuesday and Thursday from 9 am till 9 pm EST. we are a really supportive bunch on here and there is normally someone around at all times to chat with. it is Ok so admit we have fears...

Hello and welcome. We are here to support you as we can. Kath x

Welcome to the forum. You are just high maintenance gals now. You are still the same you, just a bit slower. <3

Im new here | BCNA Online Network

31 Replies

Eastmum
Member
8 years ago
Welcome @JaneyB - this forum has been absolutely sanity saving for me too - everyone here is incredibly supportive, totally non-judgmental and as you say, 'get's it'.
Wishing you all the best xx
kmakm
Member
8 years ago
Oh that's lovely to hear @JaneyB! I lurked for a long time before I got up the guts to join. Never regretted it, it's been SO valuable for me. Incredibly helpful and supportive. I hope you find it so as well.

Yes, we sure do need to break down our goals into bite size pieces... don't want to choke!

Got to sleep eventually, but didn't get enough. Hope tonight is better. K xox
Sister
Member
8 years ago
Welcome, @JaneyB. Come and talk to us whenever you need to.
JaneyB
Member
8 years ago
It's past midnight here too! Insomnia plus... Trying to tick off my goals that my newly found friend who is studying to be a therapist set for me last week. Meeting again tomorrow and I think we might have been a bit in the 'overachiever' mode when we met for the first time last week.
Hope sleep comes for you both soon.
Thanks so much. It was a big step for me to join this group and already my shoulders and heart feel lighter. xx
Kiwi_Angel
Member
8 years ago
@kmakm - the husband is snoring like a freight train!!
kmakm
Member
8 years ago
@"Kiwi Angel" Ditto! *waves from bed*
Kiwi_Angel
Member
8 years ago
U r more than welcome @JaneyB - it must be difficult when it is hard to properly communicate with the people where u are - especially when emotions come in to it. U r always welcome here for hugs - u will be squished by all that u will receive from all the wonderful women on here. Most of them are just asleep at the moment - I’m having an insomnia attack. xoxox
kmakm
Member
8 years ago
It's such a relief isn't it @JaneyB?! Hang in there. K xox
JaneyB
Member
8 years ago
Thanks @"Kiwi Angel"
Finally found the right page which had the 'join' link. Much appreciated. Appreciate the hugs. Actually have a little tear to have connected with others who "get it!"
Kiwi_Angel
Member
8 years ago
Hi @JaneyB sorry I have to join us but there is a huge amount of support here. I think to join the closed group u click on a link and request it but some of the other ladies here will be able to help u better then me. Sending u huge hugs xoxox