Feeling different after cancer

Hi @MicheleR it is an absolute mind game as much as a physical one. I will definitely check out the book. There are days where I still can’t believe everything that has happened. Losing my hair was absolutely devastating for me, like I struggled to see ‘me’ when I looked in the mirror. I wish I could offer some really sagely words, but all I can offer is that I think it just takes time to adjust to the trauma we have experienced. We were all cruising along with our lives when we were diagnosed and we had to suddenly learn about our new temporary world, a world where none of us wanted to be. Everything that was so familiar and assured seemed strange and uncertain.
I am starting to look like the old me, but I have been changed in many ways. I did go to a psychologist at the start, who was excellent and I am going to go back now that all the treatment and surgeries are done. You never have to worry about what to say to a psychologist, you just say exactly what you said here. Sometimes, just talking with someone who is not connected to you can guide you to some clarity - not necessarily answers, just recognition of how you are feeling and it’s ok. As you know, after the diagnosis it is a flurry of appointments and treatment, but when that is done you are then left to carry on and you finally have time to breathe and think about everything. I have made great friends with some girls who have been through this too and we catch up and there is just such a deep understanding of how we each feel. 
As I said, I have no real answers, just understanding and listening ears. Take care Mx