Who me ?

I'm struggling to fight the butterflies tonight. It's so easy to tell myself to keep positive, but as Tuesday draws closer the dread is creeping in. Part of me wants it to be here NOW, to get it over with so I the unknown becomes known. Part of me - like all of us - wants this all to be some kind of nightmare that isn't happening.

:(

Start my steroids in the morning. It's all too real.

Keitha

I'm struggling to fight the butterflies tonight. It's so easy to tell myself to keep positive, but as Tuesday draws closer the dread is creeping in. Part of me wants it to be here NOW, to get it over with so I the unknown becomes known. Part of me - like all of us - wants this all to be some kind of nightmare that isn't happening.

:(

Start my steroids in the morning. It's all too real.

Keitha

Hi Coco

I to am a teacher and I love it. It was the hardest thing to accept that I wouldn't be returning to work whilst I go through my treatment... although I'm hoping to return just for the last two weeks of term 4. I teach high school so I told my students. There were lots of tears and hugs and a couple even offerrred to sit with me during Chemo (the school is not far from where I'm being treated).. Kids are fantastic... Teaching is one of this things I miss most.

Trina

That's a wonderful story ! And definitely something to keep you going Coco, how lovely.

All of my friends and colleagues have wanted to know and be kept up to speed with what's happening and where I am so I have been filling them in. Last night I was at work talking to 2 colleagues about starting chemo on Tuesday, and both of them said "You are not alone, you have us, we are with you all the way whatever you need". One of them is a young man whose dad has bladder cancer, so his love and concern is deep and meaningful - and I love them all for it. I'm so fortunate.

I had a few good sleeps this week, but the last 2 nights have been dire. My mind just won't rest - waiting. I know that once I have one treatment down it will be easier cos I will KNOW what to expect. And there will be only 5 to go after that too- bonus !

One of my friends gave me a cute little black feathery hat, very chic. And several have promised to knit beanies. I am going to a LGFB workshop in a couple of weeks, I wanted to be ready. I am pretty hopeless with makeup so hints will be more than welcome, and if they have wigs to try that will be good too.

Keep on keeping on girls.

love

Keitha

Hi Keitha

I managed to get a wig that look like it could be my own hair it looks so good my husband want me to get my hair cut like it when it grows back... but I find it uncomfortable... I would recommend you wait till you are a 'nude nutt' before looking...and if you can do a 'look good.. feel good' workshop and try different styles. At the workshop I went to I tried a red wig.. felt great and I loved the way I looked but because I already had a wig didn't get it... I did however try a turban/head cover called a 'Byron Bay'... soooooooo comfortable.  I now wear it all the time. So it's worth trying different things...

good luck and have fun trying...

Trina

Hi Keitha

I managed to get a wig that look like it could be my own hair it looks so good my husband want me to get my hair cut like it when it grows back... but I find it uncomfortable... I would recommend you wait till you are a 'nude nutt' before looking...and if you can do a 'look good.. feel good' workshop and try different styles. At the workshop I went to I tried a red wig.. felt great and I loved the way I looked but because I already had a wig didn't get it... I did however try a turban/head cover called a 'Byron Bay'... soooooooo comfortable.  I now wear it all the time. So it's worth trying different things...

good luck and have fun trying...

Trina

Hi Coco & Dan, welcome to my blog - more than happy to have you along. I get so much from reading other stories and from sharing my fears too Coco, it helps A LOT !!!!

Today was ok - I was working so that always helps to make the day go fast. A few down moments when I think about the what ifs and my tummy stars churning again, but nothing I can do to stop that right now. It's all a waiting game until I know how the chemo is going to affect me. Once the first one is under my belt I will be able to face the others with some sort of plan. bit like childbirth isn't it ? You can read all the books and listen to all the stories but until it's actually happening to YOU it is impossible to really imagine or understand. I am psyching myself into having a good experience with minimal side effects. :)

I wish I was younger Dan, then I wuld go for multiple fun wigs too, but I'm too old. (Yes I am !!! I'm not being precious - my job needs serious elegance) I will give it a try if I can find one that looks like my own hair, but otherwise I'm ok with scarves and wraps, I don't mind if people know why, maybe if more do they'll go and have mammograms and donate to research.

God luck to both of you with your treatment - and do keep positive, there's truly no point to anything else. If you like reading, have a go at The Power of Now. It's a very strong powerful book I'm working my way through. Yu don't have to be religious, but you can be if you want - it works either way.

loads of love

Keitha

Hi Coco & Dan, welcome to my blog - more than happy to have you along. I get so much from reading other stories and from sharing my fears too Coco, it helps A LOT !!!!

Today was ok - I was working so that always helps to make the day go fast. A few down moments when I think about the what ifs and my tummy stars churning again, but nothing I can do to stop that right now. It's all a waiting game until I know how the chemo is going to affect me. Once the first one is under my belt I will be able to face the others with some sort of plan. bit like childbirth isn't it ? You can read all the books and listen to all the stories but until it's actually happening to YOU it is impossible to really imagine or understand. I am psyching myself into having a good experience with minimal side effects. :)

I wish I was younger Dan, then I wuld go for multiple fun wigs too, but I'm too old. (Yes I am !!! I'm not being precious - my job needs serious elegance) I will give it a try if I can find one that looks like my own hair, but otherwise I'm ok with scarves and wraps, I don't mind if people know why, maybe if more do they'll go and have mammograms and donate to research.

God luck to both of you with your treatment - and do keep positive, there's truly no point to anything else. If you like reading, have a go at The Power of Now. It's a very strong powerful book I'm working my way through. Yu don't have to be religious, but you can be if you want - it works either way.

loads of love

Keitha

Thanks Chris, good to hear your chemo experience wasn't totally awful. I'll work with that !! I am going to have a look at myself in wigs, and a dear friend who is a designer is going to make me some special headgear ! So I'll be well covered whatever I choose.

If you hadn't said your pic was a wig I wouldn't have known !

******************

Di,

Indeed, Winnie often has just the right thoughts when we need him.

love

Keitha

 

Any day that has a Winne the Pooh quote in it is a good one!  

Glad you're having a better day Keitha. :)

Di