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magicmum's avatar
magicmum
Member
13 years ago

Who me ?

"Come back for another scan, there's a grey area"

That was just over 4 weeks ago, and I thought "who, me ?" I was so sure it was just a bruise from when I had fallen some weeks before, and then they started scanning in a different spot . . .

*It's very small" "we've caught it early " "you'll be fine"

There's a little part of my head that just won't let me believe those things right now.

I have a wonderful surgeon who has done the wide excision and the sentinel node biopsy (results next Tuesday) and a fabulous support network including my family, my collegues at work and my old Nursing Mothers group - we've been friends forever, nearly 30 years,  and their love is astounding.

I am talking positively to myself every day, filling myself with good thoughts, moving forward. Everything so far has been very smooth, and fast.  But that fear of the unknown is inescapable in the middle of the night - what if it is already somewhere else ? Is my slightly upset tummy just nerves, or something sinister ?  How do I know that my aching legs are just menopausal ? How will I stop myself from bombarding my doctor wih requests for cancer scans on every part of my body ?

How do you cope with that ? Can anyone offer any thoughts ?

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  • TonyaM's avatar
    TonyaM
    Member
    13 years ago

    So sorry to hear you are going through this awful bc thing but good you've found this site.Your stomach is turning cartwheels from anxiety,that I can assure you.The waiting is the cruelist part and no amount of worrying will alter Tuesday's results.Write down all your questions for your doctor and then keep really busy and distracted ALL weekend.We have all been in that dark place where you are now.Once you know the plan you will feel much better.Hope you get clear margins and nodes.Let us know how you go.

                                    Tonya xx

  • TonyaM's avatar
    TonyaM
    Member
    13 years ago

    So sorry to hear you are going through this awful bc thing but good you've found this site.Your stomach is turning cartwheels from anxiety,that I can assure you.The waiting is the cruelist part and no amount of worrying will alter Tuesday's results.Write down all your questions for your doctor and then keep really busy and distracted ALL weekend.We have all been in that dark place where you are now.Once you know the plan you will feel much better.Hope you get clear margins and nodes.Let us know how you go.

                                    Tonya xx