Who are your true friends??

I think a lot of people just don't know what to do or say when confronted with this sort of situation. It falls outside their realm of experience and so they do nothing. I had someone in my life who made no direct contact with me during Chemo, not even a text message to say thinking of you before or after each chemo. I knew they were asking about me through my Mum but the lack of any direct contact really hurt. After a while I realized that my situation was difficult for her to cope with because she had lost her Dad to cancer. It was bringing back a lot of emotion for her and I think she felt that she could not be a support for me because of this. (did not want to bring her fears into my situation). I then started emailing her and she responded back immediately. We kept in contact this way while I was on Chemo and she actually said some of the nicest things to me via email. I am sure she would never have been able to say them to me personally without a lot of tears. Sometimes the fear of not being able to handle the emotional side of contact with someone in our situation is the reason people avoid us. It is not because they do not care but that they feel they are not strong enough to be a support. I have had others that have just dropped out of my life and I think it was just too uncomfortable for them. I wonder what will happen when they have to face me once I am back to work etc. I don't take it personally because I think they would treat anyone in my situation the same. It is their problem not mine! Try not to be hurt by other's shortcomings. Concentrate on getting well and lean on the friends and family who are able to be there for you. I also take great comfort from the 'friends' I have made here. Deanne xxxxxx