For the last 5 to 6 weeks I have been experiencing back pain, in my neck, beneath my shoulder blades, and in my low er back. Had 2 appointments this week, the discharge appointment with my rads oncologist, and then my medical oncologist. This pain is worse in my neck, and it wakes me at 3am, then Im on the couch with nurofen and tiger balm being my friends.My rads oncologist said that I should have a bone scan next week and that he would ring me next Friday, giving me a cuddle. What the....... Then came the medical oncologist appointment, who agreed with my rads doctor, he ordered some blood tests, and said that he will ring me on Thursday.You know me, miss sunny and miss motivation. What the.....? I had a little cry in the last appointment, as my wonderful hubby stated how tough I was, and when I did cry, he said Trace is a positive one, she'll get on with it, then..... I didn't know it worried you so much.... What the.....? So..... now where I thought it was side effects from Arimidex it could be something else is very scary until I know the results. My medical oncologist said that there are a number of options available in treatment if it is a recurrence. He was so kind and had picked up that I was concerned.Holy ######## What the.......... Here I am, poking along, getting ready for an art exhibition and this has been a week that has taken my breath away. I don't normally vent, so thanks for being there.Cuddles, Trace xxx

Good luck, Trace. This shit is yet another reason no-one wants this disease. Between worrying that the crap is back and dealing with the 'known unknowns' of drug side effects it's a wonder any of us function at any level. It just makes it worse, in some perverse way, when they are nice to you.Best wishes. Marg

Hi Trace ..really feel for as i have gone through this as well...life is a shit when we have to wait to know the crazy outcome..i hope it is not the big M just bone degeneration from treatment. Healthy vibes xo B

Zoffiel said: Good luck, Trace. This shit is yet another reason no-one wants this disease. Between worrying that the crap is back and dealing with the 'known unknowns' of drug side effects it's a wonder any of us function at any level. It just makes it worse, in some perverse way, when they are nice to you.Best wishes. Marg Thanks Marg, in one way I'm grateful that I have so many people on my side. I'm a private person, so the only people that know are my husband and my kids until we know more. I'm usually the one supporting others, organising the monthly support group, and ringing newly diagnosed people in my small community to make sure they are okay. I am highly aware that it does affect those around you, so don't want to make a mountain out of a molehill until it is clear what is happening. However it is stressful, and I will feel better when I know the deal and what options are available to me going forward. At the moment, Smiley Girl is still forging forward but putting up a good front. However I am now flying like a wounded bird.Youre awesome, thanks heaps, Trace xxxx

Oh Trace WTF**** indeed! What a worry!!! It might still be something other than a recurrence. Fingers crossed that it will be ok. Please let us know. HUGS HUGS HUGS

brightspace said: Hi Trace ..really feel for as i have gone through this as well...life is a shit when we have to wait to know the crazy outcome..i hope it is not the big M just bone degeneration from treatment. Healthy vibes xo B Thanks Honey, look I know that none of us get out of this thing alive, and you're right.....life is a shit when you have to wait. I was aware that chemo had blessed me with with osteoporosis in my hips and lumber spine. Alrighty then, I won't hop skip or jump for a while, and that's perfectly fine. However when they give you a cuddle and be kind it is a concern. I even told my hubby not to be kind to me, as it makes me cry more. Am I trying to be too tough ?

What the ? | BCNA Online Network

57 Replies

mum2jj
Member
9 years ago
Thanks @"Tracey B". Love the pics BTW.
Paula xxx
Anonymous
9 years ago
Hey Paula, this step over....have a rest and do the things that you enjoy to do as a distraction. It does make the time go past well and makes good memories. Sending you a big cuddle xxxx
mum2jj
Member
9 years ago
Thanks @"Tracey B" and @iserbrown all done now. My appointment isn't until May 18th (I think or 19th) so will put it our of my mind until then... Worst part was my crap post chemo veins, after 3 stabs I had to get a Dr put the cannula in under ultrasound. Thank goodness that worked.
Hugs to you both
Paula xxx
iserbrown
Member
9 years ago
@mum2jj good luck with your scans today - here's hoping it's routine! I am slowly learning that Scanxiety is part of it! They are being so thorough on checking us out it's just the inner says oh no! please no! Nah, she's right! That constant roller coaster!
iserbrown
Member
9 years ago
@"Tracey B" What great subject matter for a painting! Keeping focussed on something you love doing is great for the mind, body and soul!
Anonymous
9 years ago
Thanks Paula,
Oh dear, what a scary time for you, I think that it's the not knowing that wears you down. Here's hoping that your scan results give you some positive info. Please keep me in the loop and let me know how you go. Take good care of you xxxx
mum2jj
Member
9 years ago
Oh no.... Such a worry for you. When are you having the scans? I will be thinking of you when I have mine tomorrow. I have had new hip pain this year, and a dodgy liver ultrasound. They are pretty sure it's just my osteoarthritis and my repeat liver ultrasound was good. Hopefully the scans tomorrow will confirm that. I am sending you lots of virtual love and a big cyber hug.
Paula xxx
Anonymous
9 years ago
I totally agree Zoffiel, we all come with our chips and scratches, however we all shine through with our real selves. I will paint this one. Sorry about putting it in there twice, had trouble uploading ....LOL
Zoffiel
Member
9 years ago
I head up there from the other side of the hill.
The pic of the old wreck strikes a chord with me. Once upon a time, when things were very different, that wreck was the best thing that ever happened to someone. It was brand new and shiny and desirable. It was built for the job and was driven, literally, into the ground. Bits failed that could not be replaced, it's paint wore off, it was out of date.
But still, once, it was the best thing on the block.
Anonymous
9 years ago
We went right up into the high country, the scenery was wonderful, and the company was lovely. So a good way to distract today.