Thanks Deanne, it's been a long three years, nothing has changed. we have just embarked on this along with couples counciling, not looking too promising so far as it's a hard area to address so we have been advised and outcomes are not always what we want or expect -(so expect divorce is more the outcome) it's not really a conflict...more a loss of trust & attractiveness, i really cannot help how I feel about my look & feel, nor how my husband feels about how I look or feel...it is what is is - .....i cannot express the regret I have for not choosing to live a happy short life instead of this drawn out, disappointing existence.....but todays Monday and tomorrow Tuesday and others are worse off...so be it. thanks anyway.