It all started when I turned 40

I too had not long been 40, and had the new beginning, now in my 7th year, I too didn't know where I fit. But in 2010 I joined the mets category, but still not sure. I resisted groups as I didn't want to appear healthy, and I too burdened myself with " survivors guilt". Now I realise, we all have a story and we are each different but living the same life of fear, confusion, denial, anger, happiness and joy, and that's usually all in the same day. My friends are great, and they have experienced each of the same feelings, but I want to talk to same people who know about the good and the bad days.