Forum Discussion
Afraser
8 years agoMember
Bye for now
Dear all
I am off on holiday soon (hooray) and as I won’t be throwing in my tuppence-worth for a month or more, I have decided to take a longer break. Not for ever, but for a while.
I came to the Online Network 2 years after diagnosis. I was one of the lucky ones – I got through treatment pretty well and didn’t need much support (no small kids to care for, supportive partner, no reconstruction). I dodged nausea, fatigue and chemo brain. I worked throughout treatment and beyond. My family, friends and work colleagues were great when needed. I have a few long term side effects, but five and a half years on, I am still cancer clear, working, having a life I enjoy.
I reached out twice. Once to a really good counsellor when I didn’t like my own description of myself as a woman pushing 70 with dodgy feet, a dodgy arm and a dicky heart. Sorted that one out with some terrific advice, which I still try and act on today. And once, just once, feeling very sorry for myself, out of sorts and poor me, I emailed an interstate colleague who had been through it all a few years before me. The response was fast, funny and informative. Sometimes there is nothing like someone who knows exactly how it feels. So, when I was sufficiently objective and optimistic about myself, it seemed a good idea to see if I could be half as useful to someone else.
It’s been an extraordinary three years – everyone has said it before me, this is the club that no-one wants to join. But you really should in some ways (just don’t have cancer!) because the membership is out of the box. There is more real bravery, stoicism, generosity and warmth here than almost anywhere imaginable. There is a lot of laughter. There can be desperation but also enormous tenacity. Ideas and thoughts are shared (mad, sad, brutal, cute, uplifting – the whole spectrum!) and through that sharing everyone benefits somehow. I’ve received a lot more than I have ever given.
It’s been a privilege to be on the same page with you all. BCNA staff, that includes you too. I am booked in for the Plan B conference in August and hope I can say hello to some of you there in person.
Until then, as always, best wishes.
31 Replies
- FinchMemberHave a wonderful holiday @Afraser . I hope you'll be back. I will miss you here , you have given me and countless others advice when we've reached out. All the best xxxxx
- RomlaMemberHave a wonderful holiday and enjoy your break! I am among the many who have benefitted from your kindness , wisdom and steadiness on this blog . I will miss your online presence greatly. No doubt we are all hoping too see you on here again in the future. You have been a blessing to us all - Thankyou.XO
- PatsyNMemberI'm with @Sister. You were one of the first people who made me think I wasn't odd by liking the AC and hating the Taxol.
CU in August. I shall miss your input. - ZoffielMemberHave a great time A. See you at the conference. Marg xxx
- HendrixMemberThank you lovely for your sound advice...enjoy your holiday and until next time xx
- MoiraCMember@Afraser -I am a new member but have greatly valued your posts and your calm approach and suggestions. I wish you a wonderful holiday and all happiness.Thank you
- MiraMemberI hope you have a wonderful holiday Afraser :)
- iserbrownMemberBest wishes and safe travels. Your wisdom is entwined in the forum so whilst you're on sabbatical others will benefit from your wise informed posts.
Take care and good health - SisterMember@Afraser You were one of the first voices I found on this forum (which has sometimes been the only thing leading me forward) and I have appreciated your take on things, advice and support. Enjoy your holiday and Plan B - I wish I was able to go to meet you and everyone else but maybe later down the track. I do hope you're not gone forever but you've certainly given to this community and I'm sure you'd rather be looking forward rather than back. Thanks, Gaye
- DeanneMemberHave a wonderful holiday. I am sure that I am not the only one who has valued your generous and wise contributions. I think you have summed up the network very accurately. It is a constantly changing community, shaped by the generous women (and some men too) who share on here. Best wishes to you too. x