Talking to Doctors about feelings

Hi All

 

I am trying to come to terms with the course of treatment I was persuaded to embark upon.  And, while it is too late now to change I wanted to talk to my surgeon about how I felt.  Specifically about not being given all the facts at the start.  I wrote a "speech" so I could ensure I remembered what I wanted to say but didn't quite get to deliver much of it.  The surgeon thought I wanted to know more about the technical aspects of the SNB and spent 1/2 an hour explaining it.  My issue is that having had neo-adjuvant chemo I am much more likely to need a full node clearance as SNB might not work. Thus I am 5 times more likely to develop lymphedema (using stats provided by surgeon).  There is no advantage in terms of survival to have neo adjuvant chemo first so I am still thinking why could I not have had the mastectomy at the start which is what I asked for.  I could then have had the SNB possibly avoiding full node clearance and also possibly avoiding radiotherapy and all the risks associated with that.  Obviously I am not looking for answers here but I am so frustrated that I cannot talk to my surgeon that I am seriously considering changing - which everyone (including me) will think I am mad to do as she is very highly regarded.  I think this qualifies as a rant.  Sorry.