Struggling

Hi Jackie. Mine very similar. HER2 positive +3 stage 3. High grade. Had double mastectomy and node disection. 2 of which were cancerous. My chemo is E/C fortnightly for 4 rounds and then taxel and something else weekly gor 12 weeks with herceptin for a year. My GP also doubled my anxiety tabs. I think I have been in denial of my diagnosis. It was my second visit to the oncologist and I got anothet opinion. Crazy  hey!  And they both said its a very agressive and high grade cancer. Are you sure I asked. ?? I said I thought it was all gone. Who told you that he said. Well I did. All margins were clear scans all clear so why all this chemo. When he said I have prob had it for a long time and there could b tiny floaties in my body. That scared the hell out of me. So I can understand your thinking. I am often told I am a very strong person and you hsve the strenght to best this. Well hell is it only picking the strong. I dont want to b strong all the time. But I still am around others. Sorry if i've given my life story but some of it is funny how the mind works. All the best on your road ahead. Keep in touch and try to keep your mind in a happy place. I play relaxing music in bed and I find it helps my mind relax. X Airlie ??