Step 2 (and 3)
Surgery is done and dusted. I was lucky to have a very early morning admission and was in surgery by 9am. As you all know the less waiting you do the better your day is.
I recovered from my anaesthetic better than I anticipated and and the pain is not unbearable. I'm home safe with my little family now and I'm glad that I've ticked off a big box.
It was this morning though, after a whirlwind of surgeon visit, breast nurse consultation and physio that I realised something. It doesn't matter how "easy" my ride is, nothing will be the same. There will now be a before and an after. I will always be wary, always vigilant. I'm sure, as time passes, that I will become less obsessive but it will forever be a stain.
I unwittingly joined a club that no one wants to join. A club that doesn't want new members but offers lifetime membership to any unlucky enough to find themselves amongst the selected. It doesn't matter how hard you fight, or if you - like me - just pretend it's not happening, this is your reality. Welcome to Club Cancer. Here is a booklet, now you can never leave.
Anyway, the next step is waiting for pathology. Staging the tumour, testing the node, checking for hormone receptors. Until that's done its back to limbo. Trying to stay positive, but not making plans. I'm focused on recovery this week with a view to going back to work next week. I follow up with my doctor next Tuesday and then we will make an appropriate plan.
In the meantime, I'll just wait.
