New diagnosis, surgery imminent

Hi there,

would love to address you as something other than "D's wife" ;-)  When I was married I was one of those women that absolutely hated having mail addressed to "Mrs Jo Bloggs" - lol, bit of a feminist here. 

You've definitely had a rough go of it and talking to someone or a group of someones who have been there and done that is very helpful.  I have a 3yo son (who I had at 36) after a life up until that point of living overseas, travelliing, being a corporate professional and suffered severe post natal depression (didn't help that my son also had silent reflux and screamed his head off 24/7 for the first 7 weeks of life :-/).  Anyway, my son and I were admitted to a mum & baby hospital for mum's suffering PND (basically a psychiatric facility) and I benefited from lots of therapy, psychiatry, medication etc. and now life is very good (even despite my recent diagnosis).  I say all this because I have an intimate relationship with depression and to be frank it sounds like it's something you are battling with on top of your other health issues.  Reaching out, accepting help offered, and talking to others who have battled in the same way (whatever the battle is) is extremely beneficial.  I still take a daily anti-depressant (Pristiq) which has been a miracle drug for me and I will more than likely be on it for the rest of my life to keep my serotonin levels balanced.  I'm a very strong person and used to believe in mind over matter for everything until I experienced PND and realised that I couldn't overcome it with force of will alone.  Have you considered giving anti-depressants a go?  Do you have a supportive partner / family nearby?

On a positive note, from what you described with the BC, it sounds like the lumpectomy and node biopsies (followed by radiation of course) may be all you need to do.  I'm just assuming from what I read that you got the all clear on any cancer in lymph nodes or anywhere else? - that's amazing news, congratulations!

With regard to social life, now you're living in the city, have you thought of seeking out a group or two of women going through similar things to meet for coffee etc.?  If you're in Melbourne I'd imagine there are lots and lots of them available to you.  I'm always happy to talk and clearly so are lots of really great people.  After you reach a point when you feel better physically perhaps you could consider volunteering somewhere; a womens' shelter for example as someone with your experiece as an RN would be highly sought after.

Keep your head up "D's Wife" - we are right there with you!

Jules :-)