Mixed emotions

Hey Anita, when I found out that I had cancer, it was like my whole world had been thrown on the floor, and when I tried to put the pieces back, my life didn't look the same. What I have learned is that I am loved for who I am, and that I have the most amazing network of family and friends around me. How lucky am I to have discovered this love. Yes, I have to start my life with the new normal, but I get to choose what goes into the new normal. We sometimes can't do anything about what happens around us, however we can do something about how we respond to that. You are remarkable and individual, sending you a big cuddle, Trace ????????

Hi Jane,

I'm starting to feel a bit better now I finally talked my Hubby into shaving my hair off sometime this week as it's falling out more and more now, so I thought why am I letting it stay so unhealthy and the going grey look is not me and he agreed this morning as long as I wear my beanies and Berets all the time so my head won't get cold, I rang my best friend this morning and she was at our children's school every tuesday we have a morning where all the mum's get together and have a girls morning breakfast and a chat and she put me on speaker so my friends could say hi it made my morning talking for just a little bit to my friends and 2 of my friends are coming over to see me in the morning best time to come, I'm not tired one of them is leaving Darwin next week so I'll get to see her before she goes and my best friend is coming over later in the morning can't wait to have girlie time with my friends I try to rest as much as I can but to feel a little bit of normality amongst the bc bubble will be nice. look after your self my daughter should be home any minute the highlight of my day well one of them sending you a cuddle and a smile Anitaxxx

Hi Anita, I hope you're feeling a bit better today. I think we've all had those down days but just try to rest and may be do something special for just for you; go out for a coffee, if you feel up to it, catch up on a much loved DVD or spend some time doing something you love (I found walking along the beach - or just sitting watching the waves (when I was too exhausted) very therapeutic). I also enjoyed catching up with friends, banning all cancer talk, and just hearing about what was happening on planet normal :-)  Take care, Jane xx

Hi NICD,

You are so right I got an email from my dad's cousin last night letting me know how strong I am and how proud of me they are, it made me get very emotional I think it's because things are changing so fast which makes it hard the hair loss is the worst but I'm going to get my hubby to shave it off about mid week because it gets me down more than anything and he noticed my hair is losing it's colour and going grey now I used to colour my hair but because of chemo I can't and my brunette hair is going grey but at least I got it cut short, I think we need to be prepared when we find out what we're facing, letting emotions flow I usually do at night when I'm alone because I can have a cry without my daughter seeing me get upset she's 9 and 1/2 and extremely smart but she's in tune to what's going on we've never kept it a secret we are honest with her when she asks but don't want to overload her with to much info. I know it will pass and bc is not who I am it's just a part of me at the moment, hope to chat soon sending a cuddle and a smile Anitaxx

It's so hard, Anita, I know.

I had 1st chemo a week ago and still feel awful.  Hair loss to look forward to next week, so who knows how I will handle that?  I had long hair until a few weeks ago, got it all cut off in preparation.

We have our dark moments - anyone would.  It's ok to let the emotion flow.  It's a time when all sorts of different things to grieve about will rise up.  

But it's a moment, a phase.  It WILL pass and we are not defined by it, darling.  You will be different, we all will be, but we will know who we are and what we are capable of.

Take care xx