Loneliness

Jenn you summed it up so well.  My emotions are so all over the place and despite having a husband and two kids (9 & 10) at home I feel so abandoned and alone A LOT of the time.  It feels like once surgery was over and as I seem to cope relatively well with the chemo that everyone thinks I am fine.  

I often feel like my husband doesn't take it seriously and that I have to bear the load of still 'being there' and emotionally strong for everyone, when all I want to do is curl up in a ball and have someone else take care of everything for me; but that just doesn't happen and so I have to soldier on.

I've just had my third FEC chemo and feel like the emotions are getting on top of me- it doesn't feel easier but more like a heavy weight bearing down on me.  It's hard to watch everyone enjoy their fun normal life when I feel so restrained.  It's a bitter pill to swallow when I haven't asked for any of this and all I want is my life to go back to the way it was before - I guess that's all part of having this horrible disease. 

Tammy