Husband and chores
so here I sit after having my two ops (first lumpectomy and five nodes) then (all nodes as cancer spread) my chemo starts Tuesday and I have told the family, husband, daughter 20, her fiance 22, and y...
Forum Discussion
Everything @Sister said above.
I had a different kind of chemo, known as TC, on a three week cycle. I ended up having an allergic reaction to it and the drug they gave me to combat that made me very sleepy and dopey. So I was incapable of doing anything on infusion day.
I was OK and up for a bit of housework the next day because of the steroids I was given to take, but after that the next 3 - 4 days were out for any significant activity. I couldn't even manage stairs.
In the first two cycles, after that I slowly came up, and by the third week a sense of normalcy returned. However chemo is cumulative and by the third and fourth cycle it was hard to impossible to come back to 'normal' activity. The strength was sucked from my limbs, it was difficult to lift a full saucepan, stand-up for long, or walk up a hill without feeling my heart was going to explode. There was a lot of sitting and resting. I also had significant low blood pressure problems through chemo that led to a lot of dizziness and several collapses. My hands and fingers were also badly affected. By the end I literally couldn't fold laundry or tap on a smart phone; it just hurt too much.
This is not to say that any of this will happen to you. We all react differently. But it was considered that I didn't do too badly on my chemo, and there is no way I could have carried on as normal with the housework. Your family are going to have a serious reality check. I would do as @Sister did. Draw up a roster, do one thing when you feel able, order the groceries online, and take to your bed/couch and leave them to it.
Accept any help from friends. People will offer to help, let them. And have answers ready for when people ask 'what can I do'. Food for the freezer, walk the dog, mow the lawn, drive you to appointments, vacuuming etc. When your family see how much others are helping they may get a guilty conscience!
Hopefully they'll come round as they move out of denial and reality hits. All the very very best Kym. You'll get through chemo one way or another, I did! I have a husband who is interstate weekly, four kids 10 - 18, and an 86yo father-in-law under my roof. And a lot of lovely lovely generous friends. Hang in there, and come here to let it all out when you need. K xox
I had a different kind of chemo, known as TC, on a three week cycle. I ended up having an allergic reaction to it and the drug they gave me to combat that made me very sleepy and dopey. So I was incapable of doing anything on infusion day.
I was OK and up for a bit of housework the next day because of the steroids I was given to take, but after that the next 3 - 4 days were out for any significant activity. I couldn't even manage stairs.
In the first two cycles, after that I slowly came up, and by the third week a sense of normalcy returned. However chemo is cumulative and by the third and fourth cycle it was hard to impossible to come back to 'normal' activity. The strength was sucked from my limbs, it was difficult to lift a full saucepan, stand-up for long, or walk up a hill without feeling my heart was going to explode. There was a lot of sitting and resting. I also had significant low blood pressure problems through chemo that led to a lot of dizziness and several collapses. My hands and fingers were also badly affected. By the end I literally couldn't fold laundry or tap on a smart phone; it just hurt too much.
This is not to say that any of this will happen to you. We all react differently. But it was considered that I didn't do too badly on my chemo, and there is no way I could have carried on as normal with the housework. Your family are going to have a serious reality check. I would do as @Sister did. Draw up a roster, do one thing when you feel able, order the groceries online, and take to your bed/couch and leave them to it.
Accept any help from friends. People will offer to help, let them. And have answers ready for when people ask 'what can I do'. Food for the freezer, walk the dog, mow the lawn, drive you to appointments, vacuuming etc. When your family see how much others are helping they may get a guilty conscience!
Hopefully they'll come round as they move out of denial and reality hits. All the very very best Kym. You'll get through chemo one way or another, I did! I have a husband who is interstate weekly, four kids 10 - 18, and an 86yo father-in-law under my roof. And a lot of lovely lovely generous friends. Hang in there, and come here to let it all out when you need. K xox