Dear Jel,
thank you for your words and thoughts. I'm a bit more together this evening and during the day I've written down questions to ask my oncologist and a pros and cons list. I think what was worrying me the most was remembering how I spent the last 6 months of 2015 with shocking fatigue, stays in hospital, loss of hair etc and that in that time spent less time with the kids.
What makes me so annoyed is that even with a not so good prognosis, at the moment I am feeling quite good. I've travelled this road before and will definitely make an informed decision with my doctor .
Thanks again for your thoughtful reply, just knowing someone listens, can lift you.
cheers......Karel