Forum Discussion

purplehazelnut's avatar
purplehazelnut
Member
11 years ago

Hi and what moisturiser do you use?

Hi ladies,

I'm 41, just over a year on from diagnosis.  I had a mastectomy and radiation therapy, and I'm currently on Tamoxifen and Zoladex (although I'm stopping the Zoladex). I've been diagnosed with BRCA2 and will have to get my ovaries out by 45.  I'm struggling emotionally and mentally despite being on antidepressants.  Interestingly I still want to have sex, but it's a mental thing.  I certainly don't have much in the way of 'drive' like I used to.  I'm really sad about how much we have to sacrifice to stay alive with this bloody disease.

I've been avoiding reading in here because the whole thing makes me so depressed.  However, today I went to the Menopause After Cancer Clinic at the Royal Women's (Melbourne) and I asked the big question: is there anything else I can do about this atrocious vaginal dryness?  The answer? Not really.

Since I'm not looking at you (I'd be too embarrassed face-to-face) I'll tell you my routine: Ovestin 3 times a week (which my MedOnc allows because I'm on Tamoxifen); AciJel Restore most nights; Replens every morning; I've been using Luna Beads because the lovely ladies at Passionfruit told me they could help; I got a (bloody expensive) vibrator because they say sexual stimulation helps, and I've been using it once a week.  I use Sliquid water-based lube and Pjur silicon-based lube (depending on what's happening) and yes, I'm still having sex with my husband, just no-where near enough for my liking because I have two young kids and it takes SO LONG to get me going and he has a demanding job and is tired a lot.  I'm starting to get over the fear, but I still hate my body passionately.

I have itching and soreness, and I have skin coming off out of my vagina almost every day (which is utterly repulsive).  This started when I was just on Tamoxifen but since I started Zoladex nearly 2 months ago it's become completely ridiculous. The doc at the clinic took a swab and gave me some cortisone for the sore bits on the outside.  

So I'm wondering whether anyone's found a better option for vaginal moisturiser?  Replens is expensive (especially when you have to use it daily) and it's not really working well enough.  

15 Replies

  • mum2jj's avatar
    mum2jj
    Member
    11 years ago

    Wow Houston. What happened to Oman?  Yiu get around girl. :)

  • DaisyMarigold's avatar
    DaisyMarigold
    Member
    11 years ago

    Hi Purplehazlenut. So sorry to hear about this. Julie and Paula have given you all the right information. When I need to, I use Yes water based vaginal moisturiser every night for a few days, particularly before the weekend (which is the only time we attempt to have sex now). Other times, I use it every 2 - 3 nights. The oil-based lubricant gets slathered on my partner. Sex still hurts, and I'm now wondering if it's muscle tension because of the previous pain. Someone in the LLL group actually found a physio that helped with that stuff. She's in NSW. There's one I know in Melbourne, and I may go to see her. Just too much else on my plate right now. Yes isn't cheap, as we all know, but it's a mile in front of Replens or Sylk. Once you get the vaginal situation settled, can you get someone to mind the kids for a night, and nick off to a hotel with your husband? A romantic night might be good for both of you! Best of luck, Pam.

  • Merlins_mum's avatar
    Merlins_mum
    Member
    11 years ago

    of course you can but it just might have been a "sometimers" moment.  Hope you are well.  We move to Houston next month sometime so yet another adventure!

  • mum2jj's avatar
    mum2jj
    Member
    11 years ago

    Can I still claim chemo brain four years in?  

    Nice to see you Julie ?? 

  • purplehazelnut's avatar
    purplehazelnut
    Member
    11 years ago

    Thanks Paula.  I have lost my libido in the sense that my body isn't interested.  My sex life is really, really important to me and I mentally want it to continue.  I just don't get aroused very easily and I used to be ready at the snap of his fingers!  It's so devastating.

    I've ordered the Yes starter pack.  It's not expensive compared to other products!  I guess when you consider exchange and postage, though...  Anyway, I'm looking forward to trying that.  I'm also getting a referral to a Vaginal Dermatologist to see about the skin problem.  Only found out they existed yesterday!

  • Merlins_mum's avatar
    Merlins_mum
    Member
    11 years ago

    Good for you experimenting. The thing we both like about the yes is that it is not sticky, it feels like natural lubrication and I can put it in and around the vagina when I hop into bed so it goes all feel more like 'the old days...lol...' And not like I'm prepping myself for a major invasion!

  • purplehazelnut's avatar
    purplehazelnut
    Member
    11 years ago

    Thanks Julie.  I'm glad I'm not the only person in the whole world to have the skin thing.  Sometimes it feels like it, because the medico's don't seem to understand it and I've been unsuccessful in finding any information on the internet (and I'm pretty good with my Google-fu!)  

    I will definitely get some of the Yes.  It looks really great.  Had you tried Restore?  There's another one from the US that I want to get - I'll have to get my husband's cousin to buy it and send it on as they don't sell outside of North America.  It's called Neueve http://www.neueve.com/  My only issue is that it has palm oil in it (but so does Replens).  They claim that the 'Gold' lasts for a week!  I dream of a once a week solution!