Feels like it's never ending

Hey!

Well I think we certainly all agree and get it, how you are feeling. I often look around at people around me and sadly think gosh...there would be people who have cancer and dont even know it. I consider myself lucky having had it twice but caught early, not everyone gets that chance with any sort of Cancer. 

JennyM - I agree with you, Im 9 months post Chemo and no further ahead physically, not really. Im working 3 days a week but it is killing me. I wake with horrendous pain everyday and the SAME thing...medically they shrug their shoulders and dont offer any comfort in terms of when it will all stop. The side effects are horrendous. Feels like with every one treatment they give, it causes another problem, then they prescibe another medication then snowballs into more side effects and problems. 

I too could not do a fundraiser run/walk and is upsetting that I no longer look anything like I used to a year ago...Ive never been sick, I never had a lump either time. My physicality is all as a result of treatment and thats been a tough thing to swallow for having always felt well and never been sick. Very mental isnt it??? Uuuuugh!!! 

Do what you have to do and keep moving I say! 
Melinda xo

Hi - just want to send you a hug.  It is damn difficult as our intimate knowledge of cancer sets all sorts of emotions when we hear of someone.  Just to say try and think of something around those that you know in this predicament that makes you smile.  We're all in this together and to hopefully offer emotional support when needed.  Take care and enjoy the lovely spring weather we are experiencing at present.  From Christine xx 

I agree. It seems one can't ever escape it - cancer. It is the disease of the 21st century. I guess though with attention comes funding and research. I am reminded every day even if I don't look in the mirror or think about my missing boob because I copped awful side effects of my treatment which was described as "hitting me hard with chemo and radiation". Still knocking me around after 2 years. I know my signicant lymphoedema is here to stay and the nerve damage but is anyone out there who has had a very strong regime of treatment who feels better. Every day I wake up feeling like I have been in a rugby union scrum with whole body aches and pain very hard to describe. I am on pain relief but I don't want to go higher - not sure. I kinda just want to know if it will ever end n when I ask doctors at regular visits they don't know or strugg shoulders n look at me sympathetically. I couldn't do a fundraiser run let alone even walk the kms often publicised  but I see heaps of others doing this n I guess I get a bit depressed. Is there hope?

I feel the same :( It is sooo confrontational and scary.  And just everywhere else, constantly on the news, on tv, in movies..feels like we never escape the cloud.  I am very greatful for every new day I get to spend with my family.  Life is precious and short and fragile and fear is debilitating.  I am very sorry that you have to go through this and that so many of your loved ones/friends are affected by this.  Hugs to you

It is only natural to be so much more aware and sensitive to others with a cancer diagnosis after what we have been through. Sometimes what is happening around us gets out of balance and it can seem very overwhelming. I think it usually gets better when a few good things start happening to even it up again.
Life is so random but there are always good things if we look. Sometimes I search for a positive book to read, watch a comedy movie or listen to music. As the others have said being kind to yourself will help you start to feel better. Sometimes our emotions take over and we have to get that logic back in charge.
None of us know what the future holds. Logically I reassure myself that I did all that the doctors recommended. I find it helps me to do what I can to look after my health right now. There is nothing else that I know to do so I have to let go of that worry and not let it spoil my life right now. Worrying won't do anything but stop me from getting the best out of today.
Some days are harder and it can help to talk about that on here where we all understand and don't expect that you can be positive all the time. Hope things seem better soon.  xxx

Morning I think we all live with this fear and some days are worse than others. We all need to acknowledge how we feel and try to keep moving forward. I only said yesterday how much more aware I'm about others going through treatment. Be kind to yourself we all do the best we can xx

@primek said:

It is amazing how many people have cancer really.

I find that too. It's crazy, and the morbidity just keeps rising - but I suppose the population does. It's amazing how lonely it can be too, when so many people are also walking around dealing with it. 

@Cook65 said:
I want to be there for them but I don't want to be there for me. Does that make sense?

I'm not looking forward to hitting average age. Facing circumstances like this are almost inevitable and I have no idea how I'll handle it. Probably like you seem to be. Just wanting to be a support network, ready with empathy, sympathy, and advice, but not really knowing what to do with myself. Please take care, it's far too difficult to be there for others if you aren't looking after yourself.
I really hope that by the time you read this your heart is at least a little less heavy.

It is amazing how many people have cancer really. It's  okay  to feel sad. Give as much support you feel you can. Remember to look after yourself too. Kath x