Hi @Siewli
I remember feeling this way as well when I started with AC last year. There were many times I didn't want to have the chemo and many times I didn't know how on earth I was ever going to get through it. I don't know how we do it but somehow we just do. You will surprise yourself at just how strong you are and how you just keep on going. You really do just keep putting one foot in front of the other and you keep getting up each day and keep turning up for treatment and you just keep going. I know it might not seem like it right now, but you will.
I started having some counselling about two weeks after diagnosis which really helped me in the beginning too. If you find you are really struggling that might be a good option to explore.
Sending you huge hugs Siewli xx